Dream Catch Me
by McDreamOn08
Summary: A MerDer fic based around post season 4 awesomness! Day to Day lives and building a house - how can they work in both? Read and Review!
1. Plans

Dreams; a subconscious expression of who we are when we sleep, doze off momentarily, pick up a pen and put it to paper

Dreams; a subconscious expression of who we are when we sleep, doze off momentarily, pick up a pen and put it to paper. Dreams on the other hand are often overrated, unlikely occurrences of the brain going into overdrive…but sometimes we can live the dream…sometimes.

"No, no!" Meredith cried. "You can't put that there!"

Derek whipped around and handed her the pen.

"Fine, if you want to doodle all over the blueprints go for your life; but you should know that there are only so many of these I can get drawn up before the architect starts to get a little pissed off!" he told her.

"Derek, you cannot put one of the kids' rooms off the staircase – if they sleepwalk they're straight down those stairs!" Meredith protested. "I just think its best if they are closer to ours,"

Derek rolled his eyes.

"These kids are nonexistent at this stage," he said putting his arms around her from behind. "But I will change it if you want…just stop scribbling on my blueprints!"

"_Our_ blueprints!" Meredith repeated.

"_Our _house," Derek kissed her cheek and shoulder.

Meredith turned around to face him.

"_Our_ kids," she told him kissing his lips.

"_Our_ life," Derek answered.

Izzie walked into the kitchen.

"Good morning," she said happily.

"Hey you," Meredith said. "I made coffee; it should still be hot,"

Izzie picked up the coffee to smell it.

"Which coffee?" she asked.

"The one in the fridge," Meredith answered.

Izzie frowned.

"You were supposed to throw that out weeks ago!" she cried. "I dread the thought as to what your fridge will look like in the McMansion!"

"The what now?" Meredith asked.

"McMansion," Izzie reiterated. "Cristina and I have named the house!"

Meredith rolled her eyes.

"McMansion…hmm…" Derek smiled. "Maybe I'll get a little plaque for the front door…"

Izzie laughed.

"I think all you need for now is a cookbook," she shoved a cookbook into his hands.

Izzie, George and Meredith gathered around the blue prints that were spread out across the table in the resident's lounge.

"See here…Derek wants our living room to overlook the city…"

Cristina rolled her eyes.

"So…McDreamy wants to see the McStars shining across her McFace!"

Izzie and George laughed as I flashed her the sparkle pager.

"No sparkle pager for you then!" I told her.

Cristina frowned.

"You're so not fair!" she leaned over and looked at the plans. "I think the kids bedrooms need to be out of earshot!"

And with that she walked out of the room.

I looked at Izzie and George who mustered a laugh.

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"Unless you want his two million a year hand to pay for the therapy your children will need, put the bedrooms up the other end of the house!" Izzie answered.

I laughed and looked at the plans where I began to, yet again, doodle all over them.

"So if I move that there and put bathroom three here…" I noticed the room when silent, wondering why, I looked up and saw Bailey standing at the door with her arms folded across her chest.

"Are we having a tea party Grey?" she asked.

I shook my head and started rolling up the blueprints.

"Just getting organised," I replied nervously.

Bailey frowned.

"Have you forgotten that you have interns waiting for you at the nurses' station?" she asked. "Or are you too busy playing house?"

I shook my head.

"Then go!"

I threw on my lab coat and moved out into the hallways of the hospital; it was going to be a very long day and I needed to concentrate, but all I could think about were those words.

_Our blueprints._

_Our house._

_Our kids._

_Our life._

It was going to be a _very _long day.


	2. Big News

A/N: Very sorry about the change in person when writing guys, I didn't realise I was doing it, it will be 3rd person from now on though

A/N: Very sorry about the change in person when writing guys, I didn't realise I was doing it, it will be 3rd person from now on though! Thanks for the reviews…it will be pretty basic day to day MerDer coz I'm not sure where I'll take it yet!

"Mer," Derek ran up behind Meredith and grabbed her arm.

Meredith whipped around and smiled.

"I've been looking for you all day," Derek smiled as he kissed her.

"Oh really?" Meredith inquired.

Derek nodded.

"I have an idea," he said.

"What's that?" Meredith asked.

"How about we extend the kitchen into the dining area and make the dining area an alcove…?" he suggested.

"Oh, I don't know honey, I think the kitchen is big enough already," Meredith answered. "You could add some space upstairs though…I think we need a guest bedroom,"

"The nursery will serve that purpose for a while," Derek told her.

Meredith shrugged.

"It was just a suggestion," she said.

"You okay?" he asked. "Because you seem not okay,"

Meredith smiled.

"I'm great," she replied. "Tired, but great!"

Derek ran his hand down her cheek.

"Stop staying awake drawing on the blueprints and you won't be tired!" he laughed.

Meredith couldn't help but smile.

"Well if I had my own way, I would be able to sleep," she told him.

Derek rolled his eyes.

"Grey!"

Meredith whirled around and came face to face with Alex.

"What?" she asked.

"I need a favour," he said.

Meredith put her hands on her hips.

"Please and thank you are not your strong suit," she mused.

Derek put his hand on her shoulder.

"See you later honey," he smiled kissing her forehead.

"Bye," Meredith answered. "Oh and sweetie…"

Derek stopped.

"Yeah?"

"The kitchen is big enough already," she chuckled.

Derek smiled at her and walked away.

Meredith turned back to Alex.

"What's up?" she asked.

"Well, the problem at the moment is Lori, my intern, is being a total pain in the ass! She is whining about charts and I just…haven't got time for crazy right now…" with everything that happened with Rebecca, Alex was not taking crazy very well.

"I'll take her," Meredith said.

Alex smiled thankfully.

"Thanks!" he said. "I owe you!"

"My debt collecting will come around when I need a babysitter one day!" Meredith told him.

Alex laughed.

"Good, then I have a while to leave the country!" he said as he turned and walked away.

"You sure do…" Meredith sighed to herself.

"Mer!"

Meredith turned around to see Izzie standing there.

"Hey Iz," Meredith smiled.

Izzie's blonde hair flicked at her forehead as she quickened her pace.

"What's wrong?" Meredith pressed.

Izzie looked pale and frantic.

"Iz…" Meredith asked again.

"I'm pregnant," she gasped.

Meredith's jaw dropped to the floor; never in a million years would she have predicted that.

Oh, it was going to be a _very_ long day!


	3. A Very Long Day

Meredith drew in a sharp inward breath.

"Oh Iz…" was all she could say.

"But…how…I…I just…" Izzie started crying and collapsed into Meredith's open arms where she sobbed frantically.

"Who?" was the first, but stupidest, question Meredith asked.

"I-I…" Izzie's voice trailed off.

Meredith's heart sank with the dying sparkle in her friend's eyes.

"You don't know?" Meredith sighed.

Izzie trembled violently as Meredith clung to her arms.

"Iz…you need to come with me…" she said.

Izzie followed her into an empty patient room.

"What do you mean you don't know…?" Meredith asked; her beliefs were still dumbstruck with the idea that Izzie had not yet identified the father of her unborn child.

"I slept with Alex…" she blurted out. "When George and I broke up, I slept with Alex!"

"But did you…I mean…you've got an IUD…" Meredith tripped on her words.

"I had it removed a month ago…" Izzie started crying again. "Oh god, what am I going to do?"

Meredith spent the next ten minutes consoling Izzie and trying her best to take her mind off her own problems; the problematic issues that she harboured were quite meaningless when they fell upon deaf ears.

She walked into the residents lounge and flopped down before her pager sounded through the room, escapes of echoes that responded to her own silent feelings.

"Seriously?" she groaned as she picked it up. Her eyes widened as she saw the pager number. "Crap!"

She ran through the corridors of the hospital desperately until she came to a stop.

"Holy crap…" was all she could say.

Her jaw dropped to the ground.

She froze.

She couldn't move.

She was stuck.

Stiff.

Immobile.

"Grey…" Bailey looked up from the scene in front of her.

"What the hell…?" she exclaimed.

On the table was a child who looked no older than seven years old with a severed right arm.

"Oh god…" Meredith gasped.

"He was playing with his dad's circular saw!" Bailey was furious and upset amongst many other emotions. "A seven year old child, playing with a circular saw!"

"Where are his parents?" Meredith asked, still dumbfounded by the sight in front of her.

"His parents are in the waiting room…" Bailey sighed. She turned to a nurse and gave her firmest order. "Page Torres and Shepherd! Now!"

Meredith looked up at Bailey with horror.

"Can we save the limb?" she asked.

Bailey shrugged.

"Let's work at saving his life first!" she answered.

Meredith nodded.

Cristina emerged through the doors.

"Dr. Bailey you page…." Her jaw nearly hit the floor. "Cool!"

Bailey shot her furious look.

"Oh, uh…so awful!" Cristina tried not to look excited.

"Yang, book an OR and Grey, prep him for surgery!" Bailey said sternly.

When Cristina and Meredith gave her a kind of shocked and blank look, Bailey's eyes widened.

"Now!" she shouted.

In the OR Cristina and Meredith were watching Callie and Derek reattach the arm with wide eyes; it was a pretty incredible surgery and they almost felt like interns again.

"Dr. Grey, what can you tell me about nerve grafts?" Derek asked.

"You can reattach nerves using the artificial graft method, however full functionality may never return," Meredith answered.

"Okay, Dr. Grey, come and show me how to attach the artificial graft," Derek said.

Cristina's eyes widened.

"Dr. Yang, what can you tell me about reattaching the limb after the nerves have been connected?" Callie spoke up.

Cristina looked stunned.

"You need to insert a rod to rejoin the bone and then reconnect the tendons and veins with grafts that allow the blood to flow through and the muscles to contract and expand with the tendons," Cristina answered.

"When Grey is finished with the nerve graft, I want you to reattach the veins," Callie told her.

"Seriously?" Cristina asked.

"It's as cardio as it gets," Callie answered.

"Okay," Cristina replied.

Meredith stood at the table and began working with the nerves on the arm while Derek watched her proudly.

"Okay, first graft is complete…" Meredith said from behind her scrub mask.

"Move to the other side Dr. Grey," Callie instructed. "While you work on the next graft, Yang can begin on the veins,"

Meredith retreated to the other side as Cristina picked up the tools to begin her vein graft.

The women worked their hands with their proud teachers standing behind them; closely watching their every move, smiling behind their scrub masks while the two very capable residents performed magic with their scalpels.

After the surgery was over Derek walked into the scrub room and kissed Meredith.

"You're amazing!" he said happily.

"I learned from the best," Meredith answered with a smile.

Cristina emerged.

"Excellent work Dr. Yang," Derek told her.

"Thank you," Cristina replied.

Derek left the scrub room and Meredith started laughing.

"We are totally, incredibly awesome!" she cried.

"Uh, hell yeah we are!" Cristina chimed in. "High five to that!"

They slapped palms.

That evening, Meredith ran straight into Izzie with a bunch of charts in her hands; needless to say, they scattered all across the floor.

"Iz…" Meredith looked up from the pile of scattered charts.

"Hey," Izzie answered with a less than convincing smile.

"What's up?" Meredith questioned; she knew Izzie all too well. "You feel okay? Any morning sickness?"

"I am still trying to figure it out Mer…"

Meredith stood up and put the charts onto the desk at the nurses' station.

"I heard about you and Cristina," Izzie said.

"Yeah, it was pretty intense," Meredith replied.

Izzie nodded.

"Will you be home for a late dinner?" she asked Meredith.

Meredith shrugged.

"I think so, Derek and I want to have another look at the plans because we have to see the concreter tomorrow," she told Izzie.

"Cool," Izzie said. "I'll make something nice,"

She started to walk away before Meredith called after her.

"You always make nice food!"

Izzie managed a smile before she walked on.

Later that night, Meredith and Derek walked through the doors to the smell of pot roast in the oven.

"Mmm…smells good," Meredith called out as she hung up her coat.

"I love Izzie's pot roast," Derek commented.

"Let's take the plans in and show her," Meredith suggested.

They walked into the kitchen to see Izzie sitting with her head in her hands, tears were hitting the table top with light splashes.

"Iz…" Meredith walked over and tentatively touched her shoulders.

"What?" Izzie snapped.

Meredith frowned and rubbed her arm.

"You okay?" she asked her with a saddened look.

"Do I look okay?" Izzie's voice came out angry and bitter. She didn't realise that Derek was in the room. "I'm a slut! A pregnant whore and I have no idea who the father is!"

"You are pregnant?" Derek exclaimed.

Izzie's head shot up.

"Oh, and I also have a big mouth and impeccable timing!" she said as she started to cry.

Derek's instincts gave way and he rushed over to kneel beside the chair.

"You'll be okay," he said as he patted her knee. He gave her a tight hug and let her cry into his shirt. "We'll look after you,"

Meredith watched on with a smile.

"McDreamy…" she said softly to herself.

After dinner, Izzie walked upstairs into her room; Meredith followed her and sat on the bed as Izzie changed into her pyjamas.

Izzie stood in her bra and pyjama pants and stared side on in the mirror. She rested her hands on her abdomen and stared back into the mirror.

"I'll probably get really fat…" she commented.

"No you won't," Meredith assured her.

Izzie sighed heavily and slipped her shirt over her head; she lied down on the bed and ran her hands over the fabric of her shirt.

"Iz…" Meredith pressed.

"I guess I'll have to try to be a good mom…" Izzie continued.

"Izzie…"

"I mean, I can bake…but I'll probably be alone…"

"Izzie…"

"I'll be a fat house mother surgeon with a little bratty kid…"

"Isobel Stevens!"

Izzie's hair flicked around to stare at Meredith.

"I'm pregnant too…"


	4. New Additions

Izzie sat upright and stared at Meredith with wide eyes and no response; this was Meredith Grey; she didn't go and get herself pregnant…the sleeping with inappropriate men thing just made her slightly legendary for women! She certainly didn't come across for the mommy tracker.

"I'm sorry, I think I hallucinated…because I seriously just heard you say you are pregnant…" Izzie said.

Meredith took a deep breath.

"Oh you heard right," she answered.

"But…you…I mean it's McDreamy's right?" Izzie asked.

Meredith's eyes flared with embarrassment.

"Of course it is!"

Izzie nodded.

"Okay…so let me get this straight…you and I…we're like…going to be mom's…together?" she asked.

Meredith's eyes welled with tears.

"Uh-huh…" she sighed.

Izzie too started crying.

"Damn these pregnant hormones…" Izzie cried.

"It sucks!" Meredith agreed.

"We're pregnant, emotional whores…" Izzie sobbed.

Meredith started crying harder and almost laughed.

"No, I'm the whore…you've just gotta locate the daddy!" her giggles spluttered out.

Izzie started laughing too and their giggles turned infectious and pretty soon, they were hysterically laughing.

"Oh god…you and I are going to be mothers…" Izzie cried. "Imagine what will happen!"

"I'll probably walk into the hospital and leave mine in the car…" Meredith said.

"I'll take mine to the supermarket and probably pick up the baking goods but leave the kid in the trolley…" Izzie laughed.

"Oh god!" Meredith put her head in her hands and let tears roll down her cheeks while she attempted to suppress her laughter.

"Crap…" Izzie said through her giggles. "It's the only word…"

"We can't say that once the kids are big…" Meredith said to her. "Oh no!"

"What?" Izzie exclaimed.

"That means something else!"

"What's that?"

"No more tequila!"

Izzie threw her hands up.

"Oh why? Why does god want us to suffer?" she cried.

"I didn't even get to enjoy my last shot of tequila…" Meredith said with all hints of resentment.

"I couldn't even enjoy a cigarette!" Izzie chimed in.

"But you don't smoke!" Meredith cried.

"And it means I can't ever do it now!" Izzie exclaimed.

A knock sounded at the door.

"Hey…" Derek poked his head around the door to see both girls sitting on the bed in a wad of tissues with tear streaked faces. "Oh god, what's wrong?"

Izzie shook her head.

"I got upset and Mer doesn't like seeing people cry…" she answered. "I don't know how she'll go seeing a baby cry…"

Meredith jabbed her with her elbow.

"Well you'll need to babysit and babies cry a lot!" Izzie told her.

"It's a little thing called an antihistamine!" Meredith shot back.

"Oh god!" Izzie laughed.

Derek gave Meredith a mortified look.

"I was joking!" Meredith cried.

"I should hope so!" Derek answered. "Well at least you're not the one having a baby…"

Meredith's eyes widened and Izzie nearly fell off the bed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Meredith asked.

"Oh, well you and I both know we aren't ready for a baby…" Derek said; his voice slowed. "I mean, Izzie is…well motherly…"

"And I'm not?" Meredith exclaimed.

"Well no…I mean you will be…one day…" Derek put his hand to Meredith's cheek.

"Have we got some more house plans to be looking at?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah!" Derek used that comment as his way out of the hole he had dug himself into.

Meredith leaned over and gave Izzie a hug.

"You'll be fine," she assured her. "Sleep well," she put her hands on Izzie's belly. "Sleep well little baby," she whispered.

Derek smiled and instantly changed his opinion.

"Goodnight Iz," Derek said.

"Goodnight," Izzie replied.

Meredith and Derek walked back downstairs and spread the blueprints across the table.

"Look, with the slab going down tomorrow, it doesn't make much of a difference if we change the upstairs nursery into a guest bedroom…we can just add the nursery on when we need it," Derek said holding a pencil over the blueprints.

"Well…" Meredith snatched up the pencil. "The problem is, if we found ourselves in the situation where we needed a nursery, we wouldn't have one!"

Derek frowned.

"We'd have nine months to add the extension!" he cried. "And it's not like we need it now, so let's not think about it…"

Meredith shook her head.

_The brainless brain surgeon._

"Okay, sure, whatever," Meredith said.

Derek put his hand on Meredith's hand with the pencil. He lightly guided her hand over the page and drew a heart.

Meredith started laughing.

"You're so corny…" she commented.

"Oh, you wanna go there?" Derek laughed. "Miss, five hundred candles in the shape of a house!"

Meredith chuckled and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Tired?" Derek asked.

She nodded.

"Are you okay?" Derek pressed.

"Yep…" Meredith replied.

_NO!_

"Anything you wanna talk about?" Derek questioned.

"Nope…"

_YES!_

"Are you sure?" Derek sighed.

"Uh-huh," Meredith answered.

_NO!_

Derek put his arm around Meredith and pointed at the blueprints.

"If we _ever_ have an emergent need for a nursery…" he pointed to their bedroom. "Here, is just fine,"

Meredith smiled at him.

"Okay,"

Derek kissed her cheek and then her nose.

"I love you," he told her.

"I love you too," Meredith replied.

"Wanna go to bed?" Derek asked.

Meredith nodded.

They walked upstairs and Meredith climbed into bed, rolling on her side to allow Derek to wrap his arms around her.

"Goodnight," he whispered.

"Goodnight," Meredith replied. She placed her hand over her belly before muttering a very quiet goodnight to the baby.

--

The next day Meredith and Derek walked up to the land really early to meet the concreter.

"Good morning Dr. Shepherd, Dr. Grey!" the concreter said. "So we're just forming up the job this morning, but we're expecting to pour tomorrow, provided that this rain holds out,"

Meredith looked at Derek with sparkling eyes.

"How exciting!" she exclaimed.

Derek put his arm around her and kissed the side of her head.

"Welcome home Dr. Grey!" he said softly.

"Right back at you Dr. Shepherd," Meredith replied.

They watched for a little while as the foundations of their new life were built.

Upon arrival at the hospital Izzie ran straight into them.

"Iz!" Meredith said, shocked to see her so quickly. "I was going to come and find you…"

"I have to get blood from both Alex and George…I need you to do it!" she said.

Meredith stopped and turned to Derek.

"How about I find you later?" she said to him.

Derek nodded and kissed her before turning to walk away.

"So you've told them?" Meredith asked Izzie.

"Not exactly…" Izzie sighed.

Meredith folded her arms.

"So, _how_ am I going to get these blood tests?" she questioned.

"You're smart!" Izzie cried.

Meredith almost laughed.

"God, you're killing me!" she sighed.

The elevator dinged and George stepped off.

"Ahem!" Izzie said a little loudly with not a very subtle hint.

"George!" Meredith called. She turned to Izzie and flashed her a tired glare that said so much in such a small gesture.

George came over.

"Hey," he said to both of them.

"Bye," Izzie flicked around and walked away hurriedly.

George looked confused.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Derek and I are doing some clinical studies on blood and tumour progression, can I use you as a sample?" Meredith asked.

"Why?" George questioned. He grew panicked. "Oh god, I have a tumour! I have a tumour!"

Meredith grabbed his arm.

"Relax, you don't have a tumour, it's a comparative study on the difference in PH levels with healthy males versus the tumour patients!" she was not good at lying.

George sighed.

"Okay," he said.

Meredith drew blood from George and sighed heavily at the things she did for her friends.

She tried the same stunt on Alex but he wasn't as convinced.

"Spit it out Grey!" he cried. "What's the problem? I don't really believe this whole lot of crap about clinical trial bullshit, so you might as well say it!"

"Just give me the damn blood Alex!" Meredith snapped.

Alex rolled his eyes and reluctantly allowed her to draw the blood.

"You're very strange Grey…" he commented.

Meredith looked up and smiled.

Later that day while Meredith was on the phone to the concreter, Izzie came barging into the resident's lounge.

"Okay sure, thanks Steve, I've gotta go!" she hung up the phone and eyed the chart folder. "Verdict?"

"I can't look!" Izzie cried.

"You have to…" Meredith said.

"You read it!" Izzie told her.

Meredith snatched open the chart; her eyes widened.

"Oh...okay…"

"Well?"

**Okay, I know, it's mean and horrible and cruel to leave you there like that but I have to so I've got some bulk for the next chapter! Thanks so much for the reviews, I really, really appreciate it!**

**I'll try my best to get some more chapters up by the end of the week!**


	5. Confessions Part 1

**You wanted to know who the father is so i posted a very short chapter to serve your curiosity. it's a two part chapter called Confessions. in this you will see both confessions to the respective fathers! After the two confessions, i warn you that there will be a cliffhanger and then the chapter after will be called "Reactions". I will try my best to get these up over the next couple of days!! **

"Izzie…" Meredith sighed. "I can't…tell you…you need to read it…"

"I can't read it…just tell me!" Izzie cried.

"It's Alex…"

"What?"

"It's Alex…"

"Oh god…"

Izzie's words fell into a pile of silence as she sank down to the ground, belting closed fists to the floor and allowing the tears to stream down her cheeks as they covered the laminate. Meredith knelt down next to her and touched her back, the response was furious and Izzie shook it off.

"It's going to be okay…" Meredith sighed.

"No its not!" Izzie sobbed. "It's not going to be okay!"

Meredith tried her best to console her friend but it was no use; Izzie was beyond the ability to be consoled.

"You have to tell him…" Meredith said.

Izzie whirled around and glared at Meredith with flaring brown eyes that nearly turned a shade of orange caused from her anger.

"I know that!" Izzie yelled. She stopped and thought about it. "And the hypocrisy of it Meredith, you still haven't told McDreamy about McBaby!"

Meredith put her head in her hands.

"I know…" she sighed. "Okay…I'm going to tell him now, if you go and tell Alex!"

Izzie grabbed Meredith's arm to pull herself up.

"Deal," she said.

Meredith smiled and walked out of the room.

She walked down the hall and ran right into Bailey.

"Grey, what are you doing? I thought you were in the pit today?" she asked.

Meredith frowned.

"I was…"

"So why aren't you there now?"

"I…um…well…" Meredith stumbled. "I need to find Dr. Shepherd…"

"I have just had Nurse Debbie change the sheets from the last time you tried to find Dr. Shepherd! Pit, now!" Bailey said sternly.

Meredith couldn't find a reason to argue with her so she merely kept walking.

Bailey frowned and knew something was different.

"Grey…" she called after her.

"What?" Meredith whipped around. "I mean…yes Dr. Bailey?"

"Everything okay?" Bailey asked.

"Sure," Meredith replied.

She made her way down to the pit with a stack of charts when she ran straight into Derek.

"Hey!" Derek looked happy to see her. He leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "How's your day?"

Meredith shrugged.

"Can't complain…um, have you spoken to Steve…how is the slab?" her questions came out in a jumble.

"Yeah, it's not too bad," Derek replied. "It's all very exciting if you ask me!"

"I agree!"

"You okay?" Derek knew her all too well.

"Can we talk?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah, but I haven't got long honey so…" he started.

"I'm pregnant," Meredith interrupted.

Derek's jaw dropped to the floor.

"What?"

Meredith nodded.

"Oh wow…" Derek leaned back against the wall and put his hand to his forehead.

**Okay, it's short I know. But this is part one of the two part chapters Confessions. I didn't want to do them in one chapter because I think I owe it to both of the ladies to have separate chapters! Izzie will be telling Alex in the next chapter!!**

**REVIEWS Please!! Thank you so much!**


	6. Confessions Part 2

**Okay here's part two of Confessions; I hope you are happy with who the father is. I am a pretty die hard Gizzie fan, but everyone was pretty hopeful for Alex and I think that he deserves a little happiness.**

Izzie ran through the corridors, her heart was beating faster than ever and she couldn't begin to describe just how she was feeling.

She felt a hand on her arm and she screeched in shock.

"Oh my god!"

Izzie whipped around.

"George…" she breathed.

"Hey, are you okay?" George asked putting his hand on her shoulder. It made her jolt even more and he knew something was wrong. "What is it?"

Izzie shook her head.

"Izzie…it's me…George, you can tell me anything…" George told her.

Izzie sighed heavily and started to cry.

"Oh god, Iz…what is it?" George grabbed her to hug her.

"No, no…I'm just…I can't… and I'm so sorry…" Izzie sobbed.

"Iz…please…" George pleaded.

Izzie cried harder.

"Please don't George…" she pushed him away and kept walking; the tears were flowing freely like a tap slowly filling a sink.

George wasn't satisfied with her response, so being the best friend he knew how, he followed her down the hall.

Izzie felt her wrists grabbed my George's familiar hands.

"George…" she cried as he pulled her around the corner.

He pushed her lightly against the wall to stop her moving away.

"Talk to me!" he almost demanded.

Izzie put her head down but it was raised again by George.

"George…" she sobbed.

"What is it?"

"I can't tell you…"

"Yes you can!"

"No I can't!"

"Izzie you need to tell me…because I will spend the whole day worrying and I know that it isn't good to be worried when you are a doctor…" George began rambling.

"I'm pregnant…" Izzie sobbed.

George stopped.

"Oh my god…" he sucked in a deep breath. "Is it…I mean…?"

"No, and for your very unwelcome information, it is not yours!" Izzie cried.

George couldn't believe his ears.

"Oh my god…" he repeated.

"Is that all you can say?" Izzie cried as she shoved him away, she started walking away.

"Who…?" George asked.

"What?"

"Who did you have sex with?"

"I…"

Mark walked past the two of them and stopped and frowned.

"Interns…" he groaned.

George's eyes widened and he hit himself across the head.

"You had sex with McSteamy?" he yelled.

Everyone stopped and stared at Izzie who turned a deep shade of red.

"I wish!" Mark chuckled.

"Run away man whore!" Izzie snapped at him. She turned to George with an angry expression. "No!"

Alex walked by whistling a chirpy tune; Izzie glanced over at him and looked back at George.

"Alex?"

George's emotions erupted and his eyes flared with anger. So rather than repeat the syphilis brawl, he walked away clenching his fists by his side.

Izzie walked over to Alex.

"What's the go with the foetus?" he asked with a chuckle. "Did he find out we had sex?"

Izzie nodded.

"On call room, now!" she told him.

"Oh, someone wants more…" Alex chuckled.

"Alex, shut the hell up!" Izzie yelled. "Get your ass in the on call room now!"

Alex followed her into the on call room and jumped as she slammed the door with a loud bang.

"What's up?" he asked.

"You!" Izzie yelled.

"Oh so what if he found out we had sex…!"

"So what?"

"It was just sex!"

"No it wasn't!" Izzie screamed; tears started rolling down her cheeks.

"What…you want something more?" Alex was confused now.

Izzie shook her head.

"Iz…with everything that happened with Rebecca…I just…" Alex sighed. "There is so much that is going on and I can't begin to…"

Izzie cried harder; it was all she seemed to do at the moment.

"And we won't have Mer at the house much longer to break up all the arguments…" Alex continued. "And we're just…"

"Having a baby…" Izzie couldn't hold it in any longer.

Alex stopped.

"Excuse me?"

"We're…I'm having a baby…" Izzie said.

Alex stopped and drew a deep breath.

"Whoa…"

**Okay it's all out in the open! The next chapter will be REACTIONS; it's how both Der and Alex take the news! Not sure how I will approach it yet, but i am just glad to have served your curiosity!!**

**REVIEWS...like it or hate it, i love hearing from all of you!**


	7. Author's Note

A/N

So I thought I would take the time to say thank you to all of the readers. This fic is pretty well off the ground because of you!!

The next chapter will be based around the reactions of Derek and Alex. Over a few more chapters I will probably skip ahead a little so that I am not drabbling on about nothing.

The foundations of the house will slowly go throughout the time of the pregnancy with a lot of arguments! SO be prepared for Meredith to blame her hormones a lot!!

Once again, thank you so much for all the reviews I really appreciate it!!


	8. Reactions

**Okay, so this chapter will cross between the reactions of Derek and Alex and the news they have just been given; I will try to make it as less confusing for you as possible as this will show very different scenes but very similar actions on both accounts.**

**

* * *

**"Excuse me?" Derek asked.

Meredith felt her eyes fill with tears as the words attempted to escape her small voice once more.

"I'm pregnant…"

"Yeah…I heard you the first time, I'm just making sure I got it all…" Derek's words were harsh and cold. "But seriously…like, with a baby?"

"What else could I be pregnant with?" Meredith snapped; her words too, were icy and frosted his ears with a response that was so unlike Meredith.

Derek stood staring aimlessly at her for a moment as he desperately tried to find some words or seek an answer that would comfort him.

* * *

"Sorry?" Alex asked.

"You heard me!" Izzie said abruptly.

Alex's eyes widened with a look that she'd never seen before; he looked stunned…in a way, almost scared.

Then he did something that Izzie never expected; not from Alex Karev, Dr. Evil Spawn, the vermin…the father of her child…

He reached out and touched her belly.

"Our baby?" he whispered as tears fell down his cheeks.

Izzie felt his tears melt her heart; it was as though she was the Wicked Witch and the water was melting her to nothing.

"Our baby," Izzie rested her hands on his.

"For real?" Alex asked.

"For real,"

Izzie's tears flowed melodically down her cheeks in harmony with Alex's. A tear trickled down her cheek and under her chin where it pondered for a moment and then fell onto their hands where Alex's skin was the recipient.

He looked up at her and managed a smile.

"I'm scared…" he said softly.

"Me too…" Izzie sighed.

* * *

"Derek…" Meredith pressed. "Can you just say something…?"

Derek's eyes showed everything he couldn't say; an action that was so unlike him, yet so much like Meredith in many ways. Usually it was he who tried to read her, but in this case he couldn't be more puzzling. He looked at her desperately, an ocean of blue melding into the green current her eyes provided; the desperation and anxiety evident in the hesitant gaze that was usually filled with glittering hope.

"A baby?" he whispered.

"Yes…"

"A family…we're going to have a family?" Derek asked.

Meredith nodded.

His hands; just like Alex's reached out to graze her scrub shirt. Meredith watched them shake as his fingertips rested lightly on her abdomen. Like the pull of a river body, she felt drawn to his warmth.

"I just…I never expected…" she started to become teary and emotional; tears falling freely from her eyes, willingly down her cheeks.

"So…I guess we'll need that guest bedroom after all…" Derek tried his best to make light of the situation that was scaring them both to death.

Meredith didn't buy it.

"Don't joke!" she cried shoving his hands away. "This isn't funny and it sure as hell isn't a joke! It is damn serious and you think that you can make a joke? It is a very big something! It is something that I sure as hell cannot do!"

Derek tried to hold her; take her in his arms; anything that would calm her, but she refused flatly and instead, began pounding on his chest with her tiny ineffectual fists. With his much larger and stronger hands, he grabbed her wrists in an attempt to lightly restrain her. She had completely lost it by now and was sobbing uncontrollably at his resistance; out of control and beyond consoling as tears threatened her eyes once more.

"Let me go!" she cried.

"No!" Derek snapped. "Stop it! Stop hurting!"

"I can't stop hurting!" she yelled. "Nothing will stop me hurting because nothing can fix this! Nothing can make it better!"

Against all will, however, she finally gave in and felt his arms encircle her.

"Just stop hurting…" Derek whispered in her ear as he stroked her hair. "It will all be okay…"

Meredith's grip tightened around him and at that moment, all she could do was hope.

* * *

Alex stared at Izzie for a while; he wondered if this was all really happening or if he was in one of those bad dreams where he couldn't wake up. Water swirling to enter the drain as the sink emptied…that's how he imagined himself.

_Maybe I've totally lost it?_ He thought. _Maybe I've been sedated…they've locked me up in psych…I've seen how morphine works, Meredith was the prime example…_

The past month with Rebecca had been an unfolding nightmare that left him with little hope of attaining peace and happiness in the near future.

But looking back at Izzie, none of this was a dream. He let their eyes remain in an uninterrupted gaze. The hazel clashed with the deep sadness of the brown eyed blonde that sat before him as a broken and scared woman.

Izzie stared back at him studying every frown and glimmering flick of his eyes as they darted from side to side.

Broken was she, but destruction seemed the only appropriate word for describing the hazel that reflected in her vision.

A destructed and demolished universe held him captive in the sheer horror of his life.

"Alex…"

Alex sat down on the bed in the on call room and pulled her to sir down next to him. He cupped her neck with his palm as he pressed his forehead to hers and let their tears meet each other, combining like a delta to form an ocean of fear.

"We can do this…" he said softly.

Izzie sniffled slightly and nodded.

"I know…"

Alex tilted her chin up so that their eyes could meet.

"I promise I will be better at this…"

Izzie smiled against the wave of emotions that now filled her mind.

"I know Alex…"

"I will never hurt you…" he promised.

"You've hurt me before…" Izzie sighed.

Alex nodded again.

"I know that…" he said.

"Many times before…" Izzie continued. "I want this baby…"

"I want this baby too…" Alex told her.

Izzie pulled away slightly and turned her head to the side; this was Alex…he wanted a lot of things, syph nurses in particular…Addison Shepherd…_a lot of things_.

"But Iz…" Alex turned her head so that their eyes could meet.

Izzie's eyes released another lot of tears.

"I want you…" Alex finished.

* * *

"Meredith…" Derek said as he pulled back slowly to comfort the distraught woman in his arms.

"What?" Meredith sobbed.

"I love you…" he whispered.

This made Meredith furious.

"Oh, you _love_ me?" she yelled as she pulled back completely and retracted a few paces.

"I do…" Derek said to her in any attempt to console her right then.

It fell upon deaf ears.

"Seriously?" Meredith searched the room for something…anything, until she picked up her Converse sneaker from the floor and pegged it across the room at him; it hit him straight in the arm and his jaw dropped to the floor.

"Sweetie…"

"Shut the hell up!" Meredith yelled. "There is nothing that will fix this Derek, I know you love me and I don't know what you expect three words to do! But all I am going to say is that you better get your head around the fact that love _isn't_ always enough!"

Derek felt sick to hear that.

"I need to know that not only will you come home every day to tell me you love me, but that you will be here when the bad happens! And you know what? You don't have that great of a track record with these things!" Meredith's yells continued as her eyes bulged in pure rage. "You picked Addison! You kissed a scrub nurse!"

"Yes…" Derek's voice was barely audible.

"So I need to know that you will never hurt me again!" Meredith cried. "If you think you will, I cannot have this baby!"

Derek nodded.

"And you know what? I want this baby!" she yelled.

Derek waited for more, but realised that she had stopped yelling in anticipation of eliciting a response from him.

"Meredith…I will never hurt you again…" he said sincerely. "I screwed up big time…but I will never do it again…I love you too much…"

Meredith sighed heavily.

"Do you promise?" she asked.

"I promise…" Derek replied. He reached out and took her hands in his. "I love you so much…"

Meredith smiled slightly.

"I love you too…"

* * *

For both couples right then, the biggest gift of all was trust; trust for a promise that extended beyond a lifetime.

* * *

**Okay – how did you like it? I hope it wasn't too confusing, all the swapping and changing; I think both girls needed to overcome the insecurities they had with the men who knocked them up! Let's face it, nor Derek or Alex have great track records, but it was a real eye opener for both men as to how much their decisions impacted the future…**

**Reviews adored!!**

**Amy.**


	9. Size and Sickness

Okay, these reviews everyone are so fabulous

**Okay, these reviews everyone are so fabulous!! I love hearing from all of you because it makes my day more than you could imagine. I am from Australia so I tend to post before I go to bed and check when I get up! So it LITERALLY makes my day.**

**Over the next few chapters the house will be going up quicker than both Mer and Der could imagine. **

"Derek!" Meredith called from downstairs in the kitchen.

"Hang on!"

Izzie flipped the pancakes and stared over at the pictures of the slab.

"Wow, it doesn't look very big…" she commented.

Meredith nodded.

"That's what I am going to talk to him about!" she told Izzie.

Izzie laughed.

Derek wandered into the kitchen fiddling with his collar.

"Hey," Meredith walked over and adjusted the collar a little more. "So I am just looking at the slab…and uh, how do I put this in a way that isn't going to sound ungrateful…and like…selfish and horrible…"

"Meredith…" Derek sighed; her rambling was beginning to take form.

"Well it's small!" Meredith blurted out.

Derek laughed.

"And I know how much time and effort you put into it…and I just…" Meredith continued her rambling.

"Meredith!" Derek interjected.

"What?"

"It is supposed to look small, you would be surprised as to how many house slabs look tiny…but if you want, we'll take the tape measure up to the land and measure just so you can see that it isn't that small," Derek told her.

Meredith nodded.

"So it's really just like an illusion…?" she asked.

Derek chuckled and kissed her forehead.

"Pregnancy is making you crazy woman…" he told her.

Meredith frowned and Izzie whipped around holding the spatula in her hand.

"Hey!" they both cried.

Derek stepped back and released a nervous giggle.

"Great, now I have two pregnant women who want to kill me…" he said.

"Yeah, I was a street fighter and Izzie grew up in a trailer park!" Meredith told him. "So she'll be able to kick your little Upper East Side Fifth Avenue ass!"

Derek chuckled.

"Seriously!" Izzie told him.

"Oh…she's bringing out the seriously…" Derek laughed.

"That's not the only thing I am bringing…" Izzie pushed her sleeves up and slammed down the spatula on the table.

"Okay, okay, I get it!" Derek cried. He kissed Meredith gently on the cheek and started to walk away.

"Hurry up and find your tape measure, I wanna measure before we go to the hospital!" Meredith called after him.

"Okay!" Derek said over his shoulder.

Meredith turned to Izzie and laughed.

"Oh he was scared," Izzie said.

"Totally freaked!" Meredith agreed.

"We're that good!" Izzie chuckled.

"That good!"

Izzie held up her hand and Meredith slapped it.

"Power to the pregnant people!" Izzie said.

Derek ran back down the stairs with his tape measure.

"Let's go!"

Meredith turned to Izzie and smiled.

"Time to prove the man right!" she laughed.

Meredith and Derek arrived at the land to see the builders setting up to pin the first floor frame.

"Meredith, Derek!" Steve, the contractor, walked over.

"Just have to do some measuring," Derek held up the tape measure.

"Slab looks small?" Steve asked.

Derek nodded.

"Yeah, I built a house with my wife Therese last year, she made me measure it because it looked too small," Steve told them.

Meredith shrugged.

"Mer, come look at this over here," Derek pulled her arm so that she followed him over to the slab. "This side should be fifteen metres here…"

"Yeah, that's what it says on the blueprints…" Meredith rolled her eyes.

Derek pulled the end of the tape measure.

"Hold this," he directed.

Meredith took the end and pressed it to the edge of the slab.

Derek walked to the other side and stopped when he reached the edge; he clicked the hold on the tape.

"Come over here!" he called out.

Meredith placed the end down and strolled over to the tape, seven metres…eight metres…nine…ten…eleven…all the way to fifteen.

"Hmm, fifteen metres…" Meredith noted. "See I told you, you're paranoid for nothing!"

Derek's jaw dropped to the floor.

"Seriously?" he cried.

Meredith chuckled and looked at her watch.

"Crap, we're going to be late for rounds!" She said.

They arrived at the hospital to find Izzie laying down on the residents' lounge holding her stomach.

"Hey Iz…" Meredith said.

"Oh…" Izzie rolled on her side.

"Morning sickness…?" Meredith asked.

Izzie groaned.

"In the lightest sense of the word…"

Meredith sniffed the air.

"What is that smell?" she asked cringing. She breathed in another gulp of air and the stench startled her senses. "Oh god, I am going to throw up!" she ran to the bathroom door and heaved as she tried to open it; bursting through it she leaned over the toilet and began vomiting.

"Oh…Mer…move!" Izzie yelled.

Izzie ran in and started vomiting in the toilet while Meredith leaned against the wall.

"Oh god…" Izzie groaned. "The smell of your vomiting makes me want to puke!"

"Right back at you…" Meredith leaned over and pushed her out the way so that she could vomit into the toilet again.

As Miranda Bailey always seemed to have impeccable timing, she chose right then to walk into the lounge.

"What is that smell…" she poked her head around the door and saw both Meredith and Izzie both looked up from their positions.

"Stomach flu?" Bailey asked. "Because I would like to hope that you both weren't in the bottle last night, which seems more likely for her…" she pointed to Meredith and then turned to Izzie. "Doesn't seem so likely for you, but if I think that you two have been drinking I will…"

"It's morning sickness…" Izzie groaned.

"Times two…" Meredith chimed in with her head against the wall.

Bailey folded her arms.

"How did this happen?" she asked.

"Candle house…" Meredith sighed.

"Impulsive post-Rebecca sex…" Izzie said.

Bailey frowned.

"Okay, well get yourself some crackers and get up and moving, it's going to be a long day for you both, so get on top of it now…" she said abruptly but with a slight ounce of sympathy. She sniffed. "Oh you two are giving off a stench that…oh I've gotta get out of here!"

She slammed the door and Meredith turned to Izzie.

"We're dead…" Izzie sighed.

"Bailey knows and Cristina doesn't…I am dead!" Meredith said.

"So you better tell Cristina!" Izzie told her.

Meredith nodded.

"You need to come with me…" she answered.

A voice sounded from the other side of the wall.

"Oh god…what is that smell?" came Cristina's voice.

Meredith looked at Izzie.

"In here!" Izzie called.

Cristina opened the door and covered her nose.

"Gross…" she cried. "What the hell…? Stomach flu?"

"Morning sickness…" they both said.

"Who?" Cristina asked with a frown looking at Meredith and Izzie thinking that the most likely candidate would be Izzie.

"Both…" they replied.

"Both?" Cristina repeated.

"Yep…" Meredith said cynically.

Cristina couldn't find a proper response to that.

"Get some Glen 20 and start your rounds, it stinks in here!" she turned and walked away.

Meredith pulled herself up and followed Cristina into the lounge.

"Cristina!" she called.

"I'm happy for you…" Cristina grumbled as she walked out the door.

Meredith knew better though…

**Okay so there will be a confrontation in the works for Cristina and Meredith. **

**REVIEWS!!**


	10. The One Person

**Here is a chapter i have been dying to write! Enjoy!!**

* * *

"Cristina!" Meredith called after her.

Cristina didn't stop though, in fact, her pace quickened.

"Cristina!" Meredith ran up and grabbed her wrist.

Cristina whipped around and stared at her for a moment; Meredith stared back. This was her person, but at the moment she didn't resemble anything remotely similar to Cristina, because there was a pain in her eyes; a hidden pain, masked by the open bitterness of her words.

"What?" was all Cristina could say.

"Did you not hear me before?" Meredith asked.

"Of course I heard you!" Cristina snapped. "But we have rounds and I am not getting in trouble from Bailey because of you!"

"For god's sake Cristina, rounds can wait a moment because this is important!" Meredith yelled.

Cristina stopped and stared at her, wondering what could possibly be more important than beating everyone to the best cases on rounds.

Meredith wasn't taking any chances so in the gap of dialogue she grabbed Cristina and yanked her into the nearest empty patient room.

"Listen to me!" Meredith pleaded.

"What's there to listen to?" Cristina shot back.

"A lot!"

"One sentence!"

"A _life changing_ sentence!"

Cristina propped herself up on the bed and stared at Meredith aimlessly. They both weren't talkers and they sure as hell didn't keep secrets like this…

"Cristina…"

"What?"

"Please…"

"Don't beg Meredith, it doesn't suit you…"

"I need to talk to you about this…"

"So why did you tell Izzie before me?"

Meredith froze at the icy tone that escaped her person's lips.

"I just…I found out…and…" she stumbled on her words.

"A phone call…a text even, hell a page would have sufficed!" Cristina cried.

Meredith put her head in her hands and breathed deeply.

"You know, Dr. Wyatt says that this is why I have no ability to form relationships…" she said. "I hide things from people and avoid people I care about the most…"

Cristina folded her arms.

"I was scared to tell you…"

"That's stupid…"

"I know…"

"Really stupid…"

"You just said that Cristina!"

Cristina stared back at her and let their eyes read each other. The brown was unmistakably trying to be supportive as the darkness reflected the light green that stared back at her, mirroring the same insecurities.

"You don't have to listen to your shrink all the time," she told Meredith.

Meredith nodded.

"I know that now Cristina," she answered.

"Because you have the ability to be different!"

"I know that now," Meredith said.

"No you don't!" Cristina retorted.

"What do you mean?"

The voice of Cristina was now something that Meredith couldn't avoid; for living in avoidance was all she was capable of…or so she thought.

"I mean that you are capable of so many things!" Cristina cried.

Meredith stared in disbelief.

"But you spend so much damn time criticising yourself and worrying about all the things you are doing wrong that you don't take the time to realise the things you can do _right_!" Cristina continued.

Meredith's eyes welled with tears.

"You told me that your mother once told you to be an extraordinary woman!" Cristina reminded her.

"Yeah…"

"Then for god's sake, be unstoppable!" Cristina threw her hands up in the air with an exasperated gesture. "I told your sister this and now I am telling you! Be a force of nature! Be the force of nature I know you can be!"

"But I…"

"You're an incredible person! You will be an amazing surgeon and I know you can do this whole pregnancy thing!" Cristina told her.

Meredith started to cry.

"But if you can't see it…you will continue to make mistakes! And one big mistake you made, was telling Izzie before me…"

"I told you, I was scared…" Meredith sighed.

"You were so scared when you did the candle house…" Cristina said.

Meredith knew that was so incredibly true.

"But you bit the bullet and did it anyway!"

"I did," Meredith said quietly.

"So why couldn't you tell me?"

Cristina stopped yelling and waited for a response.

Meredith tried her best to find the response that Cristina was seeking, knowing that whatever she said may not be good enough, knowing that it could do more damage than good.

"I didn't want what we have to change…" she muttered.

"It wouldn't…" Cristina said.

"But it would, and it has!" Meredith cried as tears streamed down her cheeks with little warning.

Cristina felt her heart melting; the stony ice cold emotion washing into goo that she could never have felt before knowing Meredith.

"Cristina, I didn't tell you because I didn't want to be a failure to the one person I could never fail…"

Meredith continued to talk.

"But as much as I hate to admit this, I need you!" she cried. "I need you to tell me that I can't fail this because I don't believe it! I need you to tell me that it's going to be okay, because I am not sure it is!"

Cristina sighed heavily.

"Don't you get it?" Meredith cried. "Everything I do, you help me make the final decision!"

Cristina frowned.

"Let's go back to when I was dating Finn and Derek…I flipped the coin in the bar that night and Derek was heads…do you remember that?"

Cristina nodded.

"Do you also remember the coin landed on tails?" Meredith asked.

Cristina nodded again.

"And you said to me that I couldn't base my decision around flipping a coin! And I never! I mean, I had an appendectomy and an embarrassing conversation with Addison, but you helped me make the final decision!" Meredith told her.

Cristina's eyes darted across Meredith's expression as she continued.

"And how about when I was nearly dead? It was you who helped me cross that limbo or whatever to bring me back to life!"

"That was Denny…" Cristina said.

"No! It was you!" Meredith cried. "_You_ brought me back to life!"

Cristina's eyes widened.

"Cristina, it was you who convinced me to take Derek back, it was you who brought me back to life…" Meredith sighed. "I was scared though, that you would tell me I couldn't do this…"

Cristina nodded knowingly.

"Cristina, your advice means more to me than you will ever imagine and if you can tell me I can do this, I _know_ I can do this!" Meredith sobbed. She grabbed Cristina's hands and hoped that the right words would form.

"You can do this…" Cristina sighed.

"What?"

"I _know_ you can do this," Cristina repeated.

Meredith stopped and stared at her for a moment.

"Thank you…" she whispered.

"So…tell me…how the hell did this happen?" Cristina asked.

Meredith laughed.

"Oh, one of your brilliant plans Cristina…the candle house…" she answered.

Cristina chuckled.

"McDreamied under the McStars hey?" she said.

Meredith nodded.

"Oh it was more than being McDreamied…" she smiled.

Cristina shoved her gently.

"Do tell…"

"There is so much to tell!" Meredith told her.

"Just quickly though?" Cristina said. "Are we talking Spawn and Barbie?"

Meredith nodded and laughed.

"How?" Cristina asked.

"Um, impulsive post-Rebecca sex apparently…" Meredith answered.

"And the plot thickens…" Cristina said.

"It certainly does…"

* * *

**There it was – secrets unfolded that define the Mer/Cristina relationship!**

**Its all so crazy!**

**Reviews adored!**

**Amy.**


	11. Cats and a Running Whip Stitch

**I had a dream last night…a very strange dream about what I am about to write; it was bizarre because I saw all of this happening – which actually helped a whole lot. So I hope you see it as well as I did!**

"George!" Lexie whispered.

George didn't stir from his sleep in what was known as the crap-artment.

"George!" Lexie said again.

No answer.

"O'Malley!" Lexie shoved him.

George jolted awake and rolled over.

"Good morning!" Lexie said.

"Mmm hmm…" George groaned.

He then felt the weight of the bed shift, but he knew that it couldn't be Lexie because she was staring right at him. He sat up and his eyes widened.

"Whoa…"

A pair of eyes stared right back at him followed by a soft purr.

"Is that a…?" George stumbled on his words.

"A cat!" Lexie exclaimed. "I found her on the way home from the hospital last night…she's really big and fat and wouldn't be able to move should she get stuck in the middle of the road…and she's cute and seems housebroken…" Lexie's rambling was way too familiar for George.

"You are more like your sister every day…" George groaned.

Lexie continued.

"And Izzie and Mer are having babies and all of that jazz…and I want a baby…"

George yelped in shock.

"Oh, not as in a _baby_ baby…but a baby prototype!" Lexie told him. "So can the kitty be a baby prototype?"

"Lexie!" George interjected.

Lexie stopped and stared at him; hope crossed her eyes in ways that George had seen many times over the past couple of years in Meredith.

"We can keep the cat," he sighed deeply and picked it up.

It was a white Burmese cat with grey ears and a grey tip on her tail. She had already moulted hair all over George's quilt and was now nuzzling his hand.

George looked at the cat and smiled at her big blue eyes that stared back at him, demanding his attention.

"What should we call her?" he asked Lexie.

She shrugged.

"I'll have to let the name come to me…" she decided. "We can't just call her anything,"

"Kitty for now?" George suggested.

Lexie nodded.

"Sounds good to me," she rubbed the cat's head gently. "Welcome to the crap-artment kitty!"

* * *

Meredith pressed her forehead against the bathroom wall and groaned as she peered over at Derek as he slept soundly in bed; luckier than he realised as she had been up since five a.m.

"Ugh…" she put her hand to her slightly swollen belly and rubbed it gently while trying to ease the nausea. "Why do you want to do this to mommy? Why are you torturing me?"

In sync with her mind, her whole body heaved and she began to vomit all over again; the feeling was intensifying with the jolts of movement her stomach gave as she gagged whatever was left of her disgusting decaf coffee.

"Please make that the last one this morning…" she sighed.

Her phone vibrated from the bedside table, indicating a text message. Wondering how it was going to be possible for her to move there, she grabbed a hold of the door frame to support herself and wandered over to the bed, clutching her stomach in unease. She sat gently on the bed so not to wake Derek and flipped open her phone; it was from George.

- Lexie brought a cat

Meredith chuckled.

- As in a real cat?

It started a quick text frenzy between them.

- yes

- wher from?

- stray

- cute?

- kinda

- furry?

- moult on bed

- gross! housebroken?

- mayb…lex is more like you everyday!

- how?

- doc…ramble?

- seriously?

- c u at the hospital

- if morning sickness doesn't kill me!

- ha ha

Meredith put her phone down and felt a hand encircle her waist. She smiled and looked down to see it rubbing her belly. Over the past couple of days she had become accustomed to the fact that he did that.

"Your child insists on keeping me at the toilet bowl…" Meredith told Derek with a groan. "I wouldn't mind if it was once, but when it is five a.m. and I've had hardly any sleep and it's like every five minutes, it starts to become slightly annoying,"

"Come to work late…or not at all…" Derek suggested. "If you are sick, you should stay home; it's not good for you or the baby to work while you are sick Mer, and I just want everything to go right…"

Meredith shook her head.

"Derek, I can handle a bit of morning sickness…" just as she said that her body seemed to contradict every word in that sentence and she jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom once more where she seemed to partially miss the toilet bowl and spray vomit on the floor.

"Oh god…" came Izzie's voice as she flung the bedroom door open and stood in the doorway in a pink and furry robe.

"Morning sickness?" Derek asked.

She nodded.

"I can't go to work…" Izzie groaned to Meredith while she walked over and picked up the moisturiser from the bedside table and sat on the edge of the bed as she rubbed it into her arms.

Meredith looked up at Izzie with glassy eyes and a pale complexion that explained every ounce of sickness she was feeling.

"Me neither…" she agreed.

The girls looked at each other and then back at Derek.

"What?" he cried.

"You're an attending…" Izzie told him; it made him laugh because it was only when they needed something that they reminded him of that. At home usually, he was just Derek, not an attending, not their boss, just Derek.

"So…?"

"So, Bailey can't yell at you!" Meredith chimed in with an attempted smile that failed miserably. "You're her boss…and she well…okay she doesn't listen to you, but you _are_ her boss!"

"Meredith…" Derek sighed. Izzie looked over at him pleadingly. "Izzie…" the girls tried their best sad faces. "You both know that Miranda scares me more than life itself!"

Meredith frowned.

"And I am a pregnant resident with an unborn devil child who drags me to the bathroom every five minutes during the night, early in the morning and all morning until lunch time!" she told him. "I'll show you scary!"

"Yeah, I agree Derek, I have a temper at the best of times!" Izzie informed him in her sternest and most curt tone. "I may have a surge of pregnancy hormones at any given moment…and it could be right now…" she folded her arms and stared at him intently.

Derek sighed heavily and picked up the phone.

* * *

Later that day Meredith and Izzie were fed up with watching sad movies and chick flicks, so when Izzie emerged from the kitchen with a plate of crackers, she also brought out the _Monopoly_ board.

"Cool!" Meredith exclaimed.

On the second turn around the board, Izzie and Meredith were both excitedly playing the game like kids.

"Six moves me to…" Izzie counted six moves around the board and cracked an excited smile. "Free parking!"

Meredith huffed.

"Damn you!" she rolled the dice quickly in order to mask her poor sportsmanship, as she saw the number roll on the dice her eyes lit up. "Oh yeah…to an empty _Mayfair_! Oh I am so buying!"

She counted the cash and slammed it down on the table.

Izzie's mouth dropped to the floor.

"No!" she cried.

"And with _Park Lane_ baby, I am buying some houses!" Meredith told her with an excited tone.

"It's death corner!" Izzie cried.

Meredith clapped her hands happily.

* * *

Meanwhile, Lexie was running labs for Cristina – more importantly it was to hide from her and think so that she could name the cat. She waited at the lab desk for the results while her thoughts ran amuck.

"Here you go," Judy, at the lab desk, handed Lexie the folder with a strange look that wondered why an intern, and Dr. Yang's intern at that, had the guts to stand around doing nothing. "Labs for Cecile Hardy in 2218,"

Lexie snapped out of her daze.

"Thanks," she said.

"Lexie!" George called out.

Lexie whipped around.

"Hey," she smiled at him.

"I've got a name!" George told her.

"Hit me," Lexie prompted him.

"Buster!" George said with a smile that resembled a kid on Christmas; Lexie hated to dash his hopes but she hated it.

"Ugh…"

"No?" George questioned.

"God no," Lexie replied.

George shrugged and walked away.

Lexie was now on a search for Cristina; she looked all over the hospital and when she found her at the third floor nurses' station, she handed her the labs.

"Here are Cecile Hardy's labs; her CBC indicates a high white count and her Chem-7 indicates abnormalities," Lexie explained.

Cristina nodded and eyed her suspiciously as she looked at Lexie's scrubs closer.

"What…is that fur on your scrubs?" she asked her.

Lexie covered it self consciously.

"Ugh…is that cat hair?" Cristina cried.

Lexie nodded.

"Go and clean it off!" Cristina told her sternly. "Once your done cleaning off your McCat, get ready to scrub in, Hahn is doing an embolectomy today and I want you to try your running whip stitch,"

Lexie's eyes widened.

"Seriously?"

"Don't make me change my mind Grey!" Cristina told her. "Move!"

Lexie nodded and ran to the locker room where she threw on a new scrub shirt and picked up her phone, dialling Meredith's number.

"Mer!" she cried.

"Hey Lexie," Meredith said.

"Cristinaislettingmedoingarunningwhipstitch!" Lexie blurted out.

Meredith rolled her eyes.

"What?" she asked.

Lexie tried to slow down her voice.

"Cristina is letting me do a running whip stitch!" she repeated.

"Okay, calm down!" Meredith told her.

"I'm nervous…actually, no, I am dead set scared out of my mind!" Lexie cried.

"Okay, don't panic, you can do this!" Meredith said. "So just scrub in and remember that you can do this!"

"Thank you…" Lexie drew in quick and sharp breaths.

"I'm not hearing calm…" Meredith warned.

"Yeah, calm went out the window when embolectomy and running whip stitch came through the door!" Lexie cried.

"Lexie, you can do this!" Meredith told her calmly. "I know you can! Now you are going to hang up this phone and do a running whip stitch with Cristina right next to you all the way! And then you are going to call me and tell me all about it!"

Lexie followed her sister's instructions and hung up the phone before walking into the scrub room.

* * *

In the OR Cristina had finished repairing the embolism and looked up at Lexie.

"Dr. Grey, I would like you to try your running whip stitch," she looked up at Hahn for approval.

"Go ahead Dr. Grey," Hahn said.

Lexie walked over to Cristina.

"Cross clamp the aorta, and start," Cristina instructed.

Stitch after stitch, she imitated perfection of Cristina's running whip stitch.

"Excellent work Dr. Grey," Hahn commented. She turned to Cristina. "Nice work Dr. Yang, seems you have taught her well,"

Cristina nodded and smiled unbeknownst to everyone in the OR at that moment.

* * *

**Well there it is…a nice chapter based around a very strange dream. I have a fair idea for the cat's name, but that is coming in the next update.**

**Hope you enjoyed it!!**

**Reviews adored…**

**Amy.**


	12. Hormones and Love

**I'm skipping time slightly; Iz and Mer are 6mths along; Kitty still doesn't have a name and these hormones are becoming slightly hilarious!!**

"Whoa no, no, no!" Meredith cried.

"What?" Derek exclaimed.

"I refuse to choose between pink and baby blue!" she said folding her arms; a gesture that defined her stubbornness all too well.

"So find out the sex of the baby and we won't have to choose!" Derek shot back as he put down the paint sample at the hardware store.

"I told you that I want it to be a surprise!" Meredith picked up a white sample and flashed it at Derek. "This white is nice, it's called _fair bianca_…"

Derek raised his eyebrows and shrugged.

"Tell me again why everything is white…?" he dared to ask; at that moment, however, her hormones were so haphazard that the slightest wrong question could send her into a fit of rage.

"Because I change my mind on colours so frequently I need to settle with something that is plain and simple!" Meredith told him as she put her hands on her hips. "Something I am not going to get bored with…so that if I want to change the throw cushions or buy a new rug or…"

"But it's so plain…sterile…like a hospital…" Derek whined.

"Seriously Derek…it's not that bad!" Meredith said. "Stop whining and tell me if you like it!"

"It's fine, whatever, go for it…" Derek sighed. He walked up behind her and wrapped his hands around her waist touching her belly; at six months pregnant she looked beautiful; her belly wasn't big, but against her usually slender frame it did look rather large.

"You're grabbing my fat…" Meredith told him as she picked up a colour chart and flicked through it leisurely.

"No…" Derek replied; there wasn't the slightest, hinting amount of fat on her; if anything, her body was only slightly curvier than usual and he loved it. New or old, she would always be beautiful to him. "I love your belly…it's beautiful and curvy and…"

"And fat!" Meredith shoved his hands away.

Derek rolled his eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes!" Meredith warned; her back was still turned and Derek wondered how on earth she could have recognised the gesture that was happening behind her back. "How do I know that?"

His eyes widened even more.

"When you roll your eyes you exhale in a way that is so god damn freaking loud that I cannot even hear my own self think…" she told him. "You think you're doing it quietly but you're kidding yourself if you think I don't know…I know you all too well Derek Shepherd and it is very difficult for you to hide anything from me!"

Derek chuckled lightly and hugged her again, resting his hands lightly on her belly, giving it a gentle rub.

"You do…" he kissed her cheek.

"Stop touching my fat!" Meredith warned.

* * *

"Stop touching my fat!" Izzie exclaimed in the highest of pitched tones as she swatted Alex's hands away from her belly.

Alex groaned and looked at her with the most drained and exasperated gaze that could only have come from the past six months of hormones.

"Iz…you're pregnant – and beautiful!" he sighed. Izzie and Meredith's pregnancy insecurities were as bad as each others.

Izzie shook her head; she didn't see that when she looked into the mirror. The reflection that stared back at her was completely contrary to that in fact; she saw a fat ass, legs that rub together and melon sized breasts that were twice the size of what they used to be.

"No! I am a whale!" she told him. "My legs are so damn fat that they rub together when I walk! I can't fit into my pretty blue scrubs and my boobs have grown so big they could rule a small country!"

"Babe you're pregnant…" Alex sighed as he rubbed her belly. "If you are gaining weight, it's only because the baby needs you to…" his eyes conveyed sympathy and love for the beautiful blonde that stood before him.

"The baby wants me to be a Japanese wildlife target?" Izzie asked him with all ounces of fury crossing he usually sweet voice.

Alex pulled her over for a hug.

"Come here…" he sat down on the chair and pulled her to him; however, he winced as she put all of her new baby weight on his knees. She looked at him before he could change his expression.

"I told you!" she yelled as she jumped up. "I used to be able to just come and sit on your knee with no problem!"

Alex smiled at her; god, she was beautiful when she was mad.

"Come on, put the wooden spoon down, have a rest from the baking and we'll go upstairs and have a rest…" he suggested as he rubbed her arms lightly and kissed her forehead sweetly.

Izzie shook her head.

"No!" she said stubbornly. "I refuse to be one of those stupid pregnant women who take midday naps because they can't handle the tiredness…"

"You took one yesterday…" Alex pointed out.

_Stupid answer _– he thought as he so desperately wanted to stop those words leaking from his mouth.

"So what?" she yelled. "I said I don't want to take a nap! I did yesterday, but I don't today!"

Another voice sounded through the door.

"I don't want to take a nap!" Meredith yelled.

Derek followed her into the kitchen and widened his eyes at Alex as he and Meredith threw down the shopping on the bench.

Meredith rested her head on Izzie's shoulder.

"I'm so tired…" she told her.

Izzie nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, me too…" she agreed.

"A nap maybe?" Meredith suggested.

Alex and Derek let their mouths gape open with the automated shock that arose from that one sentence.

"Yeah, sounds good…" Izzie agreed.

"But I…" Alex went to say something.

Derek quickly cupped his hand over Alex's mouth to restrict his newly found word vomit.

"Shut up…" he muttered as he gave Meredith a gentle smile. "Just let it be…" he managed to say on the side.

Meredith and Izzie looked at them.

"Problem?" Meredith asked.

"No honey…" Derek smiled and kissed her forehead. "I have to go into the hospital and check on some labs,"

Meredith nodded.

"Okay, well don't be long…also, can you stop by that deli I love on the way home…maybe a chicken salad?" she asked him.

Derek nodded quickly; he wasn't about to argue that chicken was Meredith's least favourite dish yesterday.

He picked up his keys and made a mad dash for the door.

"Derek!" Meredith called after him.

"Yes honey?" Derek tried to sound as sweet as possible.

"Extra, extra thick strawberry milkshake!" she called.

Derek breathed out a heavy sigh and didn't say anything.

"Okay…" he said.

Meredith turned to Izzie and smiled.

"Your bed or mine?" she asked.

"Mine!" Izzie said. She turned to Alex. "Don't go out…"

"Not going anywhere Iz, I'm just gonna watch some TV…" Alex told her.

Izzie nodded, satisfied with the response.

* * *

Lexie was at the apartment when George burst through the door.

"Okay, she has been Kitty for four months now!" he told her.

Lexie nodded.

"Yes…"

George held up his _To Kill a Mockingbird_ book.

"She is now named Scout!" he announced.

Lexie raised her eyebrows and smiled.

"That's perfect!" she exclaimed. She picked up the cat off the lounge. "You really do look like a Scout!"

George laughed and joined her on the lounge.

"So how was your day?" Lexie asked as she scratched Scout's head.

George shrugged.

"Oh not bad…" he said. "Did a bit of scut…passed my intern exam…"

Lexie stopped.

"I'm sorry?"

George whipped out his intern exam results.

"I passed the intern exam!" he yelled excitedly.

Lexie squealed in excitement causing Scout to run into the bedroom.

"Oh my god!" she cried happily as she hugged him.

George stopped her hugging him though, and instead of dancing around like a fool as he had just been, he ran his hand down her cheek and looked into her eyes deeply. They were green like Meredith's eyes; but this green glimmered in happiness right back at him as he cupped her chin in his hands.

"Lexie…" he whispered.

Green coloured the brown and formed a gaze that neither had ever known.

"George…"

George didn't allow her to speak anymore, instead, he leaned in and let their lips graze for an instant, little pressure, but a tingling touch that caused shivers to erupt down Lexie's spine. George felt sparks zapping his body in ways he had never known possible; he dreamed of a moment like this…a moment where shattered dreams and love combined to form the passion of their existence.

"I'm in love with you…" George whispered.

The words clung to her heart like an unstoppable force and at that moment Lexie couldn't find the words…

But at that moment her twinkling and now tear glistened eyes were all George needed for his answer.

"I love you too…" Lexie said softly.

* * *

Meredith groaned loudly as her phone rang loudly, the new ringtone had been driving her mad and she wondered why in god's name Derek had made it the stoned smurf.

"Seriously…" she reached over tiredly and attempted to pick it up but it slipped out of her reach and fell to the floor with a light thud. "Damn it…" she groaned. It continued to ring and she sat up in frustration. "I hear you, stupid dumb stoned smurf!" she flicked it open abruptly. "Hello?"

"Meredith!" Lexie cried.

"Lex…it's three in the morning…what's going on?" Meredith groaned.

"Georgetoldmehelovedmeandthenwehadsex!" Lexie exclaimed.

Meredith groaned and flopped against the pillows.

"Lexie, do you need to go back to preschool and learn to use your words in coherent sentences?" she asked.

"George told me he loved me and then we had sex…" Lexie said, still at a fast pace but no where near as incoherent as before.

"You had sex with George?" Meredith shot back up.

"Yes…" Lexie's voice was meek and quiet.

"Okay…this is big…" Meredith couldn't find the words. "You didn't cry or anything…because that sends him into a tormented world…"

Lexie laughed.

"No, Mer…I don't follow your example…you may be my big sister, but I am somewhat wiser as to who I have sex with…" she joked.

Meredith laughed.

"This is true…well, I guess I'll come over in the morning and talk to you about it…" she said.

Lexie smiled.

"I'd like that, I'll make you breakfast…this time, no eggs!" she added.

Meredith giggled.

"See you then…" she hung up the phone and rolled over to see Derek stirring.

"Who had sex with George?" he asked.

"Lexie did," Meredith replied.

Derek groaned.

"Slightly cute…but not at three in the morning," he told her.

Meredith nodded and rubbed her belly.

"Kicking?" Derek asked.

"Yep…" Meredith muttered. She tried to ease the pain a little with her hand, but it was a belly burn she couldn't control. "Oh, come on…not a belly burn…"

Derek sighed heavily and wrapped his arm around her.

"You okay…?" he asked. "You seem not okay…"

"I just haven't slept in like weeks because of the belly burns that the baby is giving me…" Meredith told him. "It's like clockwork…at three a.m. and already it's starting…"

She rolled on her side and shoved a pillow between her knees.

"Close your eyes," Derek whispered as he leaned over and rubbed her belly with all attempts to ease the pain. His other hand made lazy circles on her back and for a moment Meredith managed to sleep…for the first time in weeks…

* * *

Lexie heard Meredith walk into the apartment the next morning.

"Lex..." she called.

"One second!" Lexie called back.

However, something caught Meredith's attention out of the corner of her eye.

"Holy..."

Meredith ran into the bedroom where Lexie was throwing a sweater on.

"You have kittens in your kitchen..." Meredith told her.

"What? I have a cat in my kitchen..." Lexie answered.

"You have KITTENS in your kitchen!" Meredith said again.

They walked into the kitchen and gasped.

Scout was a mommy.

"Oh...my...god..." both girls said.

**Okay, a little crazy I know...but it would be nice to see Lexie bring the kittens to the hospital...he he.**

**REVIEW pleeeeeeeeeeeease!**


	13. In My Daughter's Eyes Part 1

**We are finally nearing the end of the pregnancy – I want to write some pretty funny stuff in the birth scene, however I have to offer a warning that something awful will happen…I will fix it (as I always promise) but please don't hate me for the end of this chapter…have faith!!**

* * *

"Damn it!" Meredith exclaimed as her rather large belly bumped into the table edge. "Oh…Alex!"

Alex ran down the stairs; a new duty was caring for the pregnant women in the house.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"Can you pass me my keys…" Meredith groaned.

"Just a question…how are you planning to drive Mer?" Alex asked folding his arms across his chest and staring at her in an over protective brotherly way that Meredith had never known.

"I can manage!" Meredith scowled. She stopped and thought about the fact that she couldn't even pick up her keys so how was she to reach the steering wheel.

"Mer…do you want me to drive you home?" Alex asked; Meredith had come back to the house to collect some things after yesterday's big moving day.

_Home_, Meredith thought. A home for her and Derek and their child…

"Okay…" Meredith sighed.

Alex drove her to the house and Meredith looked at it contently as it sat before her; the vacant land was now filled with a life she had never dreamed of. What scared her the most, however, was now it was time to leave the old Meredith and the old life behind to begin the new with Derek.

"Thanks Alex," she said as she closed the door.

"Take it easy," Alex warned; as Meredith's OB he was very wary of how much strain she tended to put on her body.

"Okay," Meredith smiled at him. "I'm just going to sort out the nursery…"

She had bigger plans than that but that was not for disclosure; especially with Alex.

* * *

Meanwhile, Izzie was just beginning to finish her shift when she felt the baby kicking her hard.

"Ah…" she rubbed her belly to ease the pain.

George walked over to her.

"You okay?" he asked.

She nodded and winced in pain.

"Yeah, the baby is just…ow!" she exclaimed.

"Who's your OB?" George pressed.

"Dr. Miller," Izzie answered.

George looked up at the nurses' station.

"Page Dr. Miller!" he said.

"I'm okay George it's just…oh god, seriously!" she groaned.

George grabbed a wheelchair and eased her into it.

Thankfully, Dr. Miller assured Izzie that she was merely suffering from Braxton Hicks; but George wasn't satisfied with that, so he dragged her into the resident's lounge and searched his cubby for a piece of fruit or something to eat.

"Here, eat this," he told her.

She grabbed the apple from his hand and took a rather large bite.

"How goes it with Lexie?" Izzie asked.

George coughed.

"Oh…um, great!" he managed to say. "We're just taking it slow…you know, trying to get to know each other,"

Izzie smiled.

"I'm really happy for you George," she said.

George looked at her with wide eyes.

"Seriously?" he asked.

"Seriously," Izzie answered. "I'm your best friend, why wouldn't I be…?"

George shrugged.

Like clockwork, Lexie walked over to the residents' lounge with a large box in her hands.

"What is that?" Izzie asked.

"You brought the kittens to the hospital?" George asked her with a shocked look. "I thought we were going to sell them privately!"

"This is private…the buyers are just staff!" Lexie exclaimed. "And I couldn't leave them behind, they all looked so sad…"

Izzie peered into the box and squealed excitedly.

"Oh my god…" she said. "They're so beautiful! Can I have one?"

"Oh god…Alex and a pet…" George groaned.

"George!" Izzie warned.

"Of course you can…but seriously, does Alex have any track records of animal cruelty?" Lexie chuckled.

"No!" Izzie said with a giggle. "He's so different now…this baby will be a big thing for him…"

"Grey, Stevens, O'Malley!" a voice came from the doorway. "Tell me they are not cats…"

"They're not cats!" the three replied.

"What the…?" Bailey shook her head and peered in. "Oh my ever loving…"

Bailey melted for a moment.

"Tucker would love one of these…" she muttered to herself.

"The charcoal one is adorable…pretty playful…" Lexie started.

"Are you a saleswoman or a surgeon?" Bailey snapped.

Lexie retracted.

"Whichever one you would like Dr. Bailey you can have it…" she said quickly.

Bailey nodded.

"The charcoal one…" she turned to Lexie and George. "Find somewhere for these kittens to stay and then SCUT!"

Lexie and George nodded quickly before they made a dash for the door.

Bailey turned to Izzie.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

"I don't know…" Izzie rubbed her belly. "Dr. Miller thinks its Braxton Hicks…but I don't think so…"

* * *

At the house, however Meredith was hanging curtains in the nursery on a very high ladder; stupidly trying to balance her very pregnant belly while reaching out to drill the curtain rod to the wall.

"Damn…can't reach…" she muttered with a screw in her mouth.

"What the hell are you doing?" an angry and frightened voice sounded at the door.

"Crap…" Meredith said under her breath.

She turned her head to see Derek standing in the doorway with his hands on his hips.

"I am putting up curtains!" Meredith told him.

"You are eight and a half months pregnant, why the hell are you up on a six feet tall ladder trying to hang curtains?" Derek exclaimed.

"I was bored!" Meredith answered sheepishly.

"God Meredith!" Derek cried in frustration. He raced over to the ladder and grabbed her waist as she climbed down; his heart still racing as he watched her feet touch every step on the way down.

"I just wanted to do something…" Meredith sighed as her feet touched the ground.

Derek drew in a breath and stared at her with worried eyes.

"Honey, I know you were trying, but that was really…really stupid…" he told her.

Meredith nodded.

"Maybe I can just…ow!" she cried.

Derek gasped.

"What was that?" he asked.

"Um…a contraction…" Meredith told him.

"Why do you not sound more surprised?" Derek asked her. He looked at her up and down and then realised. "You've been having contractions all day?"

She nodded meekly.

"Seriously?" he cried.

"Well there is nothing they can do until the contractions are closer together…" Meredith reminded him.

Derek snatched up the overnight bag.

"We're going to the hospital," he told her. "Call Bailey!"

"Alex is my OB!" Meredith reminded him.

"No, I want Bailey for this one," Derek snapped.

Meredith stopped and grabbed his arms.

"Everything will be fine…" she told him as she ran her fingers through his hair.

Derek nodded; though he hardly believed her.

"Okay…" he sighed.

"Let's go…" Meredith smiled.

They were going to be parents...

* * *

Meanwhile, Alex was just arriving at the hospital where he ran straight into Meredith and Derek.

"Whoa…where's Izzie?" he asked them.

"She's working!" Meredith answered. "Why?"

"She's in labour…" Alex said breathlessly while he waited for the elevator to arrive. "Damn it, I can't wait, I'm taking the stairs!"

"Alex!" Meredith called after him; she turned to Derek. "Izzie is in labour too?"

Derek nodded and wondered how on earth he was going to cope with two labouring women at once.

* * *

Meredith was moved to the room next to Izzie; as that detail became apparent, Izzie chose to walk into the room to find Meredith sweating profusely.

"You okay?" she asked her. "Where's Derek?"

"He's gone to get some ice chips…" Meredith said breathlessly. "Why are you not in more pain Iz…something has to be wrong…oh god…"

"Mer, calm down!" Izzie said comfortingly. "You're forgetting that I have done this before…"

Meredith looked at her with fear.

"Does it hurt?" she asked.

Izzie nodded.

"Yep…"

"Like side splitting…?"

"Yep,"

"I'm outta here!" Meredith jumped up and went to get out of bed.

"Mer, relax, that's what the drugs are for!" Izzie told her.

Meredith sighed heavily and leaned against the pillows.

"What are you doing here?" came Bailey's stern voice.

Izzie groaned and turned around.

"Moral support?" was the only excuse she could think of.

"Get back into your room now!" Bailey said abruptly.

Izzie leaned over and gave Meredith a hug.

"See you on the other side mommy," she smiled.

"Right back at ya mommy," Meredith answered.

When Izzie left, Bailey walked over and pulled Meredith's legs into the stirrups.

"You're about six centimetres," she told Meredith. "Do you want something for the pain?"

"Oh god yes!" Meredith groaned.

Derek rushed back in spilling ice chips out the cup as his hands shook.

"We're at six centimetres…shouldn't be long now," Bailey explained. She looked down at the scattered ice chips and shook her head. "Clean up your mess, you fool!"

Derek nodded quickly and turned to Meredith.

"You okay?" he asked her.

She shook her head.

"I'm scared…" she whispered.

"Me too…" Derek admitted.

--

Izzie was leaning against the pillow and bearing down the pain when Alex returned with her milkshake.

"Oh god…" she groaned. "God…I don't know why people go back…this pain is just…"

Alex rushed over and grabbed her hands as she cried out in pain with the next contraction.

"I'll just see how far along…" Alex went to grab her legs but Izzie grabbed his hair.

"Don't you dare!" she yelled.

Alex jumped back.

"But Iz…" he said.

"Oh don't even think about it buddy!" she cried. "Remember the whole no family treating family, friends or whatever! That's where I draw the line!"

"She is right!" Bailey's voice seemed to be popping up out of nowhere lately and it was starting to cause everyone to walk on eggshells. She pulled up a chair to examine Izzie, nodding with her own thoughts. "Okay, you're at seven centimetres, I'll turn up the morphine for a bit and then I'll come back,"

Izzie nodded as Bailey left the room; she snatched up the milkshake and sculled it down in a way that Alex never thought was possible.

--

Next door, Meredith was beginning to feel more pain; she grabbed the pillow and shoved it in her face to suppress a scream.

"Oh god…" came a muffled sound.

Someone cleared their throat from the door.

"Cristina…" Derek said.

"I just came to check in…I'm not allowed too close because Bailey is on a warpath!" Cristina told him.

Meredith looked at her person and tried to smile.

"Oh don't smile, I can see you're going through hell…" Cristina told her. "I just came to say that I'll be peeking through the door any chance I get to make sure you're okay…"

"Thank you…" Meredith's voice was hoarse.

Cristina nodded and started to walk towards the door. She turned back quickly and managed a smile through the fear that what she was about to say was not true at all.

"You can do this…"

And she was about to…

Bailey walked in and announced that she was indeed now ready to push, but the shock that followed was scarier than intended; George was delivering the baby.

"Okay…" was all Meredith could say.

Derek had more faith than that, however.

"We'll be fine!" he told Meredith.

* * *

Bailey had also informed Izzie that she too was ready to start pushing and that she, Miranda Bailey would be delivering the baby.

"Okay…" Izzie's voice was just as scared as Meredith's.

"Okay Izzie, the next time you feel a contraction I want you to push… and it should be coming in four seconds…" Bailey started saying.

"Oh four seconds my ass…" Izzie grabbed Alex's hands and screamed in pain.

"Push!" Bailey told her.

* * *

"One, two, three…push Meredith!" George told her.

"Oh god, oh god, oh god!" Meredith yelled. "This is hell!"

George furrowed his brow as her pushing was not working.

"You're going to need to push harder Mer!" George said again.

"I can't do it!" Meredith was crying now.

"Another one…come on, let's get this baby out!" George coaxed.

Derek ran his hand down her cheek.

"You can do this!"

* * *

"You can do this Izzie!" Alex told Izzie as she started to cry.

"No…Dr. Bailey…I can't…" Izzie sobbed.

"Izzie, at this moment I am Miranda…and you _can_ do this! Now I need you to give me another big push…" Bailey told her.

The fetal monitor wailed.

"Oh god…what's happening?" Izzie cried.

Bailey looked at it and looked at Alex desperately.

"BP is down to forty eight!" the nurse said.

"We've gotta get this baby out!" Bailey said.

"Miranda!" Izzie cried.

"I need you to push!" Bailey said to Izzie.

* * *

"Okay Meredith, I can see the head, you need to give me one big push!" George told Meredith.

Derek grabbed Meredith's hands and felt all circulation drop from his fingers as she squeezed them tighter than ever.

"Oh god!" she yelled.

* * *

"Oh god!" Izzie screamed.

"That's it, we've got the shoulders out…" Bailey told her. "One more big push Izzie and you'll be a mom…"

The monitor was still wailing.

* * *

"One last push Meredith…" George told her.

Derek positioned himself so that Meredith could squeeze his hand one more time.

"One…two…"

"Three!" Meredith screamed as she pushed one last time.

She and Derek held their breath for a moment.

* * *

"One…two…three!" Bailey said.

"Come on Iz…you can do this…we need to get the baby out…" Alex told her as he grabbed her hands.

Izzie pushed once more and felt all the pain stop.

They drew in a deep breath.

* * *

"It's a girl…" George said.

* * *

"It's a girl…" Bailey told them.

* * *

But neither baby was crying.

**

* * *

**

Okay, before you all get horribly cranky and upset…I do not plan to let either baby die! I promise – but this fic just needs a little drama – it wouldn't be Grey's if there wasn't.

**Reviews!!**


	14. In My Daughter's Eyes Part 2

**So here is part two of the chapter; full of drama and tears - ENJOY!**

* * *

"Why isn't she crying?" Meredith asked Derek as she sobbed.

"I just have to clear the airway a little Meredith…" George told Meredith as he grabbed the baby and rushed her to the incubator.

It was like music to their ears.

A tiny little cry…

* * *

"Alex…she isn't crying!" Izzie cried.

Bailey frowned and pressed the chest of the baby with her two fingers.

"It's okay Izzie! I'm taking care of her…" she said from the other side of the room. She turned to the nurse. "Page the NICU!"

Alex grabbed Izzie and held her close.

"Miranda…what is happening?" he asked.

"Alex, I need you to stay with Izzie…" Bailey told him. "I've got her okay; I am working on her…"

"She isn't breathing is she?" Izzie sobbed. "Oh god…"

* * *

Baby girl Shepherd was also being taken care of.

"I want to see her Derek!" Meredith sobbed.

Derek looked over at the beautiful little girl being intubated and put into the incubator.

"They're just intubating her Mer; she has a collapsed lung…" Derek told her with a terrified tone.

"A collapsed lung? Oh god…" Meredith's cries were becoming all too heartbreaking for George.

* * *

"What's wrong with her Miranda?" Izzie sobbed as she tried to sit up.

"Alex, talk her through it…" Bailey told him as she continued to intubate baby girl Karev.

"What am I supposed to say?" Alex cried.

"Anything that will calm her down!" Bailey shot back.

"Baby, she's intubating her at the moment…she's not breathing on her own…" Alex told Izzie.

Izzie put her head in her hands and sobbed.

"I want to see my baby Alex!" she cried.

"They've got to take her to the NICU…" Alex tried his best to comfort her.

"Why isn't she crying?" Izzie cried.

* * *

"But…she was crying…why are they taking her away?" Meredith sobbed.

Derek looked over at George with despair.

"Derek you need to talk her through it…" George told him. "I've got to take her to the NICU…"

"Honey, she needs to go there…she's very tiny and they need to monitor her…" Derek looked over at his baby…she looked almost a faint blue.

At this point Meredith caught a glimpse and burst into tears.

"Oh god…she's blue…Derek why is she blue?" she wailed.

"I…I don't know…" Derek ran his fingers through his hair in a swift movement indicating his frustration and worry.

But worry didn't even cover what he was feeling.

* * *

Izzie watched the NICU nurses wheel away her baby as she sobbed.

"I need to go with her Alex…" she cried.

At the moment the door open she saw another incubator roll past.

"The Shepherd baby needs to go to the NICU…" a nurse mumbled.

"Oh god…" Izzie cried.

* * *

In the same moment, Meredith heard the nurses talk to each other.

"Yeah, we have the Karev baby… she's intubated…but not looking so good…"

"Oh god, Derek…" Meredith sat up as best as she could. "It's Izzie…what's wrong with her baby…?"

* * *

Both women jumped out of bed simultaneously, letting pools of amniotic fluid hit the floor as they moved as fast as they could to the doorway.

"Mer…" Izzie sobbed.

"Iz…" Meredith had tears streaming down her cheeks.

* * *

Meanwhile, Cristina and Lexie were on their way up to the OB floor where they saw the two babies being wheeled to the NICU followed by George and Bailey.

"Dr. Yang…" Lexie said hesitantly.

"I see it…" Cristina said.

They ran over to them.

"What happened?" Cristina cried.

"Shepherd baby has a collapsed lung and Karev baby isn't breathing on her own…" Bailey answered.

"Oh god…" Lexie started to cry. She looked at George. "What can I do?"

"_We_!" Cristina reiterated. "What can _we_ do?"

"Go and be with the women…" Bailey told them.

"With the babies…" Lexie said.

Bailey shook her head.

"We've just got to get them on monitors and watch them…" she told her. "I can't give you anything else…"

Cristina and Lexie both ran to the rooms and saw Meredith's room empty.

"What…?" Cristina started. But then she heard the crying.

They burst through Izzie's door and saw the two girls clinging to each other crying.

"Cristina…Lex…" Derek looked up.

"Have you seen the babies?" Meredith asked immediately.

"Yes…Dr. Bailey is working on them…" Lexie answered. She walked over and rested her hand on Meredith's arm. "They're fighters…" she told the women who at this stage seemed inconsolable.

* * *

"Maybe…we could pray…" Izzie said softly to Meredith.

"I don't believe in God, Izzie." Meredith replied.

"I do…" Izzie answered.

Bailey emerged.

"Miranda…" Derek said breathlessly.

"Dr. Bailey…what's happening?" Alex cried.

Bailey took a deep breath.

"Okay, well as you know both babies are having trouble breathing…" Bailey said. "They're intubated though and they seem like they're breathing okay with that…"

"But…" Meredith pressed.

"We need them to breath on their own…" Bailey told them.

Izzie started crying.

"I want to see my daughter…" she sobbed.

Meredith, too, started crying.

"I do too…" her cries were becoming hysterical.

Bailey nodded and tried her best not to cry.

"You can come and see them…" she said.

Both Izzie and Meredith were wheeled by Derek and Alex into the NICU where they both sat next to the incubators that held their daughters.

"Izzie…she looks just like you…" Alex said sweetly.

"Yeah…" Izzie's voice was barely audible.

Meredith peered into the incubator to look at her daughter.

"She has your nose…" Derek whispered.

"She's beautiful…" Meredith said equally as quiet.

"Have you thought of a name?" George asked.

Izzie shook her head as did Meredith.

"I don't want to…I just don't know how long I'll have her for…" Izzie sighed.

Meredith nodded in agreement.

The monitor started wailing on the Karev baby and Izzie gasped.

"Oh my god…" she cried.

Bailey ran over and listened to the baby's heart.

"Push another epi!" she ordered the NICU nurse. She then turned to Alex. "I think you need to take her back to the room…"

* * *

Meredith sat back down on the bed in the room and closed her eyes, with all hope that the past couple of hours had been a dream. As she opened them again, however, she gasped.

"Oh my…"

Bailey was wheeling in the neo-natal cot.

"What is that for…?"

"We were able to remove the intubator…she's breathing on her own…" Bailey said. "But I thought you might want to go get her yourself,"

Meredith's eyes lit up but then she frowned.

"But Izzie…" she started.

"We're still waiting…" Bailey sighed.

Meredith nodded.

Derek walked in and saw the crib.

"What…?" he said, a little confused.

"Let's go get our little girl…" Meredith smiled.

Derek's eyes lit up just as Meredith's had.

They walked into the NICU and stood at the crib looking over at the Karev baby at the same time.

"She's suffering from the same problem that we had with one of the quints, where her lungs just aren't doing what they should be…she's very tiny…" Bailey explained.

Then a thought crossed Meredith's mind.

"The quints…" she repeated.

Izzie walked in to see Meredith doing something she wished she'd thought of early.

"Are you…?" Izzie asked.

"Co-bedding…" Meredith looked up and smiled.

Izzie managed a smile.

Meredith pulled her baby from the incubator and gave her a gentle kiss.

"Just in there for a little bit sweetheart…" she whispered.

Izzie sat down next to Meredith and rested her head on her friend's shoulder as she took her hand.

"Thank you…" Izzie said softly.

* * *

About an hour later the girls were admiring their daughters when Bailey re-entered the NICU.

"Well would you look at that…" she smiled.

"She's so strong," Izzie said.

"Let's see…" Bailey looked up at the monitor and slightly disconnected the intubator.

"She's breathing on her own…" Meredith said with a teary smile.

"She is," Bailey replied.

A tiny little cry escaped baby Karev's mouth.

"That's all I wanted to hear…" Izzie whispered.

Alex walked in and saw what was happening.

"She's breathing on her own?" he asked.

"Listen to our daughter cry…" Izzie told him as she squeezed his hand.

"Music…" Alex said tearily.

"A symphony…" Izzie replied.

* * *

That night both babies were in cribs in their mothers' rooms.

Izzie looked up from her bed to see Meredith wheeling the crib in.

"Have you thought of a name yet?" she asked.

Izzie nodded and looked at Alex.

"Lily…" she smiled. "Lily Karev…"

Meredith smiled.

"Well Lily Karev, meet Tess Shepherd," she said.

"Tess…oh that's beautiful…" Izzie smiled.

And it was; and they were…

Two beautiful baby girls.

**As I said earlier; have faith - okay, both Mer and Izzie have welcomed two beautiful little girls into the family. **

**Reviews please!!**


	15. Daughters

**The next chapter is based around the two perspectives of Derek and Alex; both will be labelled according to who it is and both will be written in first person.**

**Thank you so much for all the reviews, I really appreciate it!!**

**

* * *

**

Derek

_I know a girl_

_She puts the colour inside of my world_

_She's just like a maze_

_Where all of the walls all continually change_

_And I've done all I can_

_To stand on her steps with my heart in my hands_

_Now I'm starting to see_

_Maybe it's got nothing to do with me_

I walked into the ward and came face to face with a sleeping Meredith, her hair was fanned out behind her and I could see the remnants of black circles that had just began to form under her eyes; she was tired and I knew that Tess had kept her awake all night.

While she looked tired, she looked at peace which was something that was so unlike Meredith over the past couple of years; she was always on edge and more than ever she was never comfortable. But at the moment, I saw a different Meredith…a new Meredith.

I couldn't help but hate myself, because somehow, deep down, I knew that her being with me was pretty much the root of her insecurities. I have done a lot of things I sure as hell wasn't proud of….many things I would certainly take back if I could just to make sure that she was okay and her dreams weren't shattered.

I then put one foot in front of the other to slowly make my way quietly over to the crib where Tess slept so peacefully and soundly. Oh, I couldn't bare the thought that I could ever hurt her like I hurt Meredith – an innocent little angel she was as her dark hair glittered in the sunlight as it peeked through the curtains. She was so much like Meredith, yet her hair and eyes were just like mine; I even noticed that when she snuggled in my arms and almost gave a smile that she had one little dimple on her cheek. She was amazing; my amazing Tess, a product of her beautiful mother and the love of my life.

"Tess…" I sighed as I stroked her cheek. "Daddy loves you very much…"

She opened her eyes and a combination of blue and green stared back at me as she realised I was there. I smiled down at her and tried to fight my fear of holding her. I was scared; could I ever be the father that Meredith wanted me to be?

I sure as hell wouldn't leave like Thatcher did…but I have hurt her before…she told me that once and the thought had never left my mind…

She went to cry but as I worked the courage up to pull her out of the crib, she closed her eyes again and drifted into the most peaceful slumber.

I rocked her gently as she continued to sleep in my arms, singing softly to her – in key or not, it was something I remember distantly about my father and the fact that he used to sing to me.

_Fathers be good to your daughters_

_Daughters will love like you do_

_Girls become lovers who turn into mothers_

_So mothers be good to your daughters too_

And that was what I was going to do; because I wanted to show Meredith that good fathers exist…

**

* * *

**

Alex

_Oh, you see that skin?_

_It's the same she's been standing in_

_Since the day she saw him walking away_

_Now she's left_

_Cleaning up the mess he made_

I couldn't believe that she was mine; that little innocent princess I held in my arms as I watched every stony and cold emotion run free from my body. It's like I see mothers and fathers with their babies all the time but nothing prepared me for this, nothing could ever give me this feeling.

She was beautiful; the spitting image of Izzie with fair hair and the most adorable and luscious lips…perfection.

But how the hell was I to know perfection? I mean, all I ever saw in my childhood were bottles of the cheapest and most burning whiskey imaginable. My mom was drugged off her head the majority of the time, when she and my bastard father weren't arguing and he wasn't belting the crap out of her…

Izzie was the same I guess…fitting the ideal father to her was one who never walked away; she and her mom were on their own and Izzie cleaned up a whole lot of mess that her shitty father left behind.

We were wrecked; tormented and haunted by our fathers' choice of lifestyle. I just don't see however, how I can be the best father…

But hell…what is the best father?

I'm not sure if a surgeon is the best either because we both lead such busy lives…

I'd give it up in a second though…all for my Lily…

Maybe that was the secret?

"I'll never neglect you baby girl…" I said to Lily as I kissed her forehead.

I stared at her for a while as I gently lowered her into the crib where she closed her eyes and fluttered like a butterfly into a beautiful slumber that no demon of my past, nor a haunting feeling could break. I watched her and smiled contently to myself as I wondered how I came from the asshole that hung Bethany Whisper posters all over the locker room to the blubbering schmuck that sat before his daughter choking on his own thoughts.

But then I looked back at a sleeping Izzie; my god, she was beautiful…her hair sat gently across her eyes as I reached out and flicked it from her eyes with a gentle caress of my hand. Her cheekbones were perfect and there was still a faint trace of her dimples as she smiled slightly in her sleep…my angel…my everything.

I was in love with the two most beautiful creatures in the world; Isobel Stevens and Lily Karev.

_Fathers be good to your daughters_

_Daughters will love like you do_

_Girls become lovers who turn into mothers_

_So mothers be good to your daughters too_

* * *

Both men stared at their daughters and the two beautiful women who made their dreams come true in the blink of an eye.

_On behalf of every man_

_Looking out for every girl_

_You are the god and the weight of her world_

**Thank you all so much for the reviews - I was absolutely hanging to write this chapter, I hope you love it as much as I loved writing it!! **

**The song is "Daughters" by John Mayer.**

**As always, keep reviewing - I love the feedback!!**


	16. A Recipe for Happiness

**Okay, it's really just a little Mer/Iz bonding time...nothing too exciting, but I hadn't updated in a couple of days and wanted to do so with a fill in!**

Both Izzie and Meredith were ready to take the babies home a few days later and while the boys went to work, they stayed at home caring for their beautiful daughters. At this stage, Meredith was at home by herself in the new house, which scared her more than ever because she wasn't used to the rather large and empty space that their house occupied.

She put Tess in the portable cot and leaned over looking at her lovingly, wondering how this beautiful creation was hers.

"Oh you're a beautiful little girl," she said softly to Tess as the baby opened her eyes. Her dark hair was so classic to Derek's that it was bizarre and she had the most adorable button nose that Meredith couldn't help but compare to her own in some way.

The phone rang and she reached over to pick it up.

"Hello?"

"Hey!" came the cheerful sound of Izzie's voice.

"Hey yourself…what are you doing?" Meredith asked.

Izzie giggled.

"Staring at the angel that is my daughter…" she replied.

"Tell me about it…I can't stop staring at her…it's like, if I walk away I worry she'll stop…I mean…just…" Meredith stumbled on her words.

Izzie sniffled on the other end of the line.

"Are you crying?" Meredith asked.

"No…" came the tearful response.

"Oh my god…you are really crying…" Meredith felt her own eyes well with tears.

"Damn the post natal hormones…" Izzie said tearily.

Meredith laughed through her own tears.

"Tell me about it!" she cried. "Wanna come over?"

"Yep, give me twenty minutes…" Izzie replied.

It didn't take Izzie long to make her way to McMansion, as Cristina referred it. As she opened the door, Meredith felt a smile cross her eyes.

"Hello beautiful Lily!" she exclaimed.

"Where's your precious?" Izzie asked.

"In her cot, why don't you take Lily there and I'll make coffee…" Meredith suggested.

Izzie nodded and walked over to Tess' crib.

"Hello darling girl…Lily you can lay with Tess…" Izzie placed Lily in the crib and walked over to Meredith where she sat at the table adjacent to the kitchen and stared across the open view of Seattle. "Mmm…how could you get sick of this view?"

"I don't…" Meredith put a cup of coffee in front of Izzie.

She sat down to face her friend and smiled contently, which was really something that Izzie had never seen in Meredith before Tess was born.

"Happy?" Izzie asked.

"More than ever," Meredith sighed. "What about you?"

"Very…" Izzie answered.

"Alex?"

"A whole new Alex…it's like he is swallowed a _My_ _Little Pony_ or something…"

Meredith started laughing.

"Seriously! It's like he spends all his free time buying pretty pink dresses and wondering where he is going to keep the shot guns for when Lily dates…which I reminded him is a good thirteen years away…" Izzie continued.

"But he loves being a dad…" Meredith concluded.

"He does…" Izzie smiled. "And Derek?"

"Oh he's smitten…I don't get any time with her when he gets home because its like he had missed out on five hours of her life…" Meredith told her. "He has this whole thing where he refuses to be like Thatcher and miss out on his daughter's life…"

Izzie nodded.

"I get that though…" she said.

"Me too, but he just worries too much sometimes…" Meredith replied.

"Mer…let me put this into perspective…you nearly _drowned_ and at one stage you nearly _blew up_! Of course McDreamy is going to be worried!" Izzie cried.

Meredith almost laughed at the ridiculousness of what her friend had just said, though it had all been true in many respects; Derek did have every right to be worried.

But gone were the days of dark and twisty Meredith…

It wasn't before to long that day that Meredith and Izzie were preparing dinner.

"What is in your cupboard…god, how much pasta do you eat?" Izzie exclaimed. "Oh, I knew your eating would go down hill after you left the house…Derek should be feeding you more!"

"Izzie! Pasta is the only thing I know how to cook so if something happens and Derek is late at the hospital, I need to eat and it is the only thing I _can_ eat without burning down the kitchen with your sort of niece in the McMansion!" Meredith shot back.

Izzie held her hands up in defence.

"Point well taken!" she continued to rummage and pulled out a bag of rice. "I think we'll do risotto…"

Meredith frowned.

"Uck!" she cried.

"Fine…taco shells will start well…" Izzie pulled a box of tacos out and set them down to watch Meredith's face. "You have to eat them!"

"Okay…" Meredith groaned.

"God…Tess will have to learn to love pasta!" Izzie told her with a sigh. "Because it seems that will be all she'll be eating…"

"I have a cookbook!" Meredith retorted.

"Mer, _Microwave Dinners for Dummies_ is not a cookbook!" Izzie said with a laugh.

Meredith chuckled and reached under the cupboard for the large saucepan.

"What are you doing?" Izzie cried.

"Umm…helping…" Meredith replied.

"Oh, no, no, no…this is my domain!" Izzie told her. "_You_ stay on _your_ side of the kitchen girl!"

"Oh come on!" Meredith groaned.

"Uh-uh…go and play with the girls!" Izzie told her.

Dinner was served on the table by the time Derek and Alex entered the house after work.

"Hey!" Alex followed Derek; he walked over and leaned in the cot to kiss Lily on the forehead. "Hey baby girl…" he looked up and smiled at Meredith. "Hey!"

Meredith smiled back.

"Hey…" she turned around to see Derek. "Hey you!"

"Hello," Derek leaned over to kiss her and then proceeded to lean into the cot to see Lily and Tess. "Hello beautiful girls…" he gave them both a little kiss on the forehead. "How was she today?"

"Perfect," Meredith replied happily. "She's a perfect baby…"

And then Tess started to cry.

"Oh…" Meredith raced over to the crib to pull her out. "What's wrong honey…? Are you okay…?"  
Derek couldn't believe how motherly her voice had become…a change brought about by the bundle of joy in her arms.

Later that evening, after dinner, Izzie and Alex went home and Meredith and Derek walked upstairs to the bedroom to put Tess to sleep.

"Goodnight darling," Meredith whispered to her as she put her in the crib and turned on the lullaby mobile.

As she walked into the bedroom she felt Derek's arms snake around her waist and she knew exactly what he wanted. She whirled around and felt his hands lift the hem of her shirt so that the skin of his palm could come into contact with her stomach. It was all new to her, this post baby body…but she didn't mind and Derek seemed to love it.

She felt his hands travel under her shirt and search desperately for her bra clasp as she fumbled with his belt buckle; they'd gone without for what seemed to be too long.

"Mmm…" Derek murmured against her lips as she managed to drop his pants to leave only his boxers. His skilful surgeon hands worked their way around her shirt as he whipped it over her head and left her very new curves exposed and available for him to explore.

Meredith fell back onto the bed and pulled him with her so that she could carefully unbutton his shirt, letting her fingers gently caress his skin as she flicked it open, button by button…tingling sensations through his body. She was too good at this and she knew it; but this was so familiar to her…while a new level of familiarity was about to bestow Derek.

That night they made love in a way they'd never before…their lives were so different and for that, they were grateful; because the meaningless pursuits they once dreamt were now a blemish of the past.

**The next chapter, I am skipping ahead a little time, three years actually...will explain more in the next update.**

**As always...REVIEW!!**

**Amy.**


	17. Three Years Later

**Here we are, a little further down the track. James Shepherd was concieved a little after Tess was born and is now coming on one year old; a bit of a cutie!! Hope you are enjoying the story!!**

**Three Years Later**

"Tessy! Time for dinner!" Meredith called from the kitchen as she heard the pitter patter of little feet on the floor above her head.

She turned to look at little James who crawled in and pulled himself up on the chair flashing Meredith a proud smile.

"Hey you clever little boy!" Meredith exclaimed.

"Momma!" James said reaching out with one arm.

Meredith laughed and walked over to James, picking him up and bouncing him on her hip.

"Dad?" James asked.

At eleven months old, he was beginning to use words.

"Yes, daddy will be home soon…now where is your sister…Tess!" Meredith yelled from at the bottom of the stairs.

Tess made her way down the stairs holding onto the banister.

"Mommy…help me…" she slowed down about three steps away from Meredith.

"No, you're a big girl Tessy, you can do it!" Meredith replied.

Tess groaned and grabbed onto Meredith's leg; while she inherited every single feature of Derek's, from his sapphire eyes to his thick and dark hair, she was tiny just like Meredith.

"What were you doing?" Meredith asked her as they walked into the kitchen.

"I was playing tea party!" Tess replied.

Meredith laughed.

"Who with?" she questioned her daughter with the wildest imagination that a three year old could have.

"Umm…" Tess rested her cheek in the palm of her hand. "Ginny…"

Ginny was Tess's imaginary friend.

"What did Ginny have to drink?" Meredith asked.

"Chocolate milk!" Tess answered.

As most three year olds do…Tess lost interest in the subject and moved onto a new topic.

"When is daddy coming home?"

"Dad!" James exclaimed.

Meredith heard the jingle of keys in the front door and whipped around to see Derek entering the kitchen.

"Daddy!" Tess shrieked excitedly as she ran to the doorway and threw her arms around Derek's legs.

"Hey!" Derek replied happily.

"Dad!" James reached out from his high chair.

"Hey buddy!" Derek walked over to tousle his son's dark hair.

Meredith stood with a hand on her hip.

"Remember me? You're beautiful wife?" she asked.

Derek laughed and walked over to her, giving her a soft kiss on her lips.

"Hello honey," he said sweetly.

"How was your day?" Meredith asked.

"Okay…I missed my kids…" Derek said as he sat down and pulled Tess up into one of his arms where she sat on her knees across his lap. She ran her hands over his five o'clock shadow and smiled.

"You're spiky daddy…" she giggled.

Derek chuckled and nuzzled her with the grain of his stubble causing her to erupt in giggles in his arms.

"Daddy!" she shrieked.

"Dad!" James reached out. "Pay!"

Derek chuckled and reached over to pull him out of the high chair.

"Sess!" James pointed to Tess.

"Yes bubby, that's Tess!" Meredith smiled and kissed his forehead.

James turned around at the slight sound of Meredith's voice and smiled. He reached over and touched her face with his tiny little hands.

"Momma…" he said softly.

"Yes bubby?" Meredith asked.

"Tiss!" James puckered his lips for a kiss.

Meredith laughed and leaned down to kiss him.

"Where's my kiss?" Derek asked.

"Oh, now I have three kids?" Meredith smiled as she quickly pecked his lips.

"Me too!" Tess exclaimed jumping up on the chair and throwing herself into Meredith's arms.

Meredith spun her around as she giggled; Tess then planted a sloppy kiss on Meredith's cheek.

"Oh Tess, that's beautiful darling!" Meredith laughed as she rubbed off the residue of Tess from her cheek.

Derek laughed and sat James back in his high chair.

"What's for dinner?" he asked Meredith.

"Pasta!" Meredith replied.

"Surprise, surprise!" Derek joked.

Meredith rolled her eyes.

"Well you're just lucky that you are eating mister!" she shot back.

"Ha, you called daddy _mister_ mommy!" Tess giggled.

"Because daddy is being cheeky!" Meredith told her. "Sit up in your chair and I'll get you some pasta baby…"

Tess sat up straight in her chair and banged her knife and fork on the table top.

"Tess…stop please," Meredith pleaded.

Tess giggled cheekily, as did Derek and in turn, James.

Meredith looked at the three of them, all expressing similar expressions with exactly the same face and features; each child was becoming more like Derek every day.

"You're too much alike!" Meredith told them.

Derek chuckled and picked up the pasta packet.

"Did you check these?" he asked; Tess suffered from a severe nut and egg allergy that had to be closely monitored. Any contact with this food could send her into immediate anaphylactic shock.

"Yeah, I checked about ten times Derek," Meredith answered.

Derek nodded and set down the packet as James happily chewed on a piece of bread while he waited for Meredith to sit down to help him eat.

"Here you go bubba," she said putting down the pasta in front of him.

James smiled widely at her.

"Ta!" he exclaimed.

"Oh, beautiful manners darling," Meredith chuckled as she leaned down to kiss his forehead. "Now, have a mouthful please sweetie,"

Derek watched lovingly as Meredith fed James all of his pasta; she really was a super mom and he loved it.

Later that night, Meredith was sitting on the lounge reading to Tess. Meredith and Derek couldn't deny that Tess loved to read and she was becoming good at recognising words and sounds as Meredith read.

Derek sat to listen to Meredith read, as it was strangely fascinating; her voice changing with the sounds and characters.

"And the prince whisked her away to a castle where they lived happily ever after…" Meredith smiled at Tess and kissed her forehead. "Time for bed darling girl,"

Tess nodded sleepily and stretched for Meredith to carry her.

Meredith walked up the stairs quietly as she knew that James would be sleeping in the next room adjacent to the hallway. Derek followed her upstairs and flicked on the light so that Meredith could put Tess in her new bed that was covered in a pink and white polka dot quilt. Derek looked around the room and smiled at all of the pink that Meredith actually put in there; one wall was a deep pink while the rest a softer tone. Up on the wall was a beautiful black and white photo of Meredith with Tess in the first week she was born. Around the room were stuffed animals and dolls to all your heart's desire; Tess was an amazing little princess…their little princess…

She was growing into a beautiful young lady.

**Okay, I know it's a little short, but I have nothing but a little bit of fluff in my head; Mer is a real natural mom…and you'll see that more now she has two children. James and Tess are both spitting images of Derek…but Tess's hair, though dark, bares a stark resemblance to Mer's. **

**REVIEWS!**


	18. Dangerous Decisions

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I really apologise for the delay in the posting; but here's another chapter. I have about two chapters to go so I will end it on a good note!!

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"Tess!" Meredith called from the bottom of the staircase.

"Yes mommy?" Tess called back.

"Is James with you?" Meredith asked.

"Yep!"

"Where is he?"

"In my bedroom playing with my Barbie!"

"Is the safety gate locked?"

"Yes!"

"Well don't forget that Aunty Izzie and Lily are going to be here soon, so make sure you don't make too much of a mess!"

"Kay!"

Meredith smiled to herself and made her way into the kitchen where Derek was sipping a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper.

"Honey, did you know that the chief of surgery at San Francisco Memorial is standing down?" Derek asked Meredith.

"No…" Meredith replied. "Is that Stan Woods?"

"Yeah,"

"Mmm…my mom talked about him a lot, he was a very talented man,"

"Yeah…there's a massive run for chief over there…"

"Probably the same as when Richard announced his retirement," Meredith mused.

Derek chuckled.

"Oh yeah, and Mark wanted it…" he said. "Fat chance hey…"

"Well, Richard won't retire for a little while yet, and then I guess it will be a whole new blood bath," Meredith told him.

Derek laughed again.

"Oh it will be a war…" he said.

"Mmm hmm…" Meredith kissed his forehead.

"Mer…" Derek started.

"Yeah honey…?" Meredith answered.

"I…um…"

The doorbell rang and Meredith heard the door click open.

"Hello?" came Izzie's voice. "It's only me!"

"And me!" came Lily's excited voice.

Meredith walked out into the living room to see an excited Lily run through the door and straight into her.

"Aunty Mer!" she exclaimed.

"Well hello beautiful girl!" Meredith grabbed her and hugged her tightly. "I think you're bigger than when I last saw you!"

"I'm a big girl!" Lily told her.

"You certainly are!" Meredith replied setting her down on the ground. "Go upstairs honey, Tess will be waiting for you!"

Lily eased herself up the stairs using her hands.

"Don't forget to close the safety gate baby!" Izzie called out after her.

"Kay mommy!" she answered.

Meredith heard the girls giggling and she and Izzie made their way into the kitchen where Derek was still sitting.

"Hey Iz," Derek smiled.

"Hey!" Izzie answered patting his shoulder.

Derek set his newspaper down and stood up.

"I'm going to head down to the lake for some fishing," he told the girls.

Meredith and Izzie giggled to themselves and smiled at him.

"What's so funny?"

"Well, it's just you do seem to fish a lot lately," Izzie chuckled.

"I don't!" Derek cried defensively.

"Uh…yeah you do…" Meredith smiled as she ruffled his hair and touched the light stubble that formed around his chin lightly. "But I don't mind, I do love my rugged man…"

"But I still look sexy in my scrubs?" Derek asked.

"Still McDreamy…" Meredith replied kissing him.

"Yeah, I'll agree…" Izzie laughed.

Derek flashed his ever so famous McDreamy smile.

"Thanks lovelies," he answered as he turned his back and walked out of the kitchen and down the back stairs with his fishing rod.

Meredith turned to Izzie with a tired smile.

"How are you?" she asked.

"I'm okay," Izzie answered. "But I don't understand why they call it the terrible twos… I am still fighting with them everyday at three years old!"

"Oh, Tess is the same…the other day I told her that she couldn't have strawberry ice cream at the store and she pushed over an entire stack of cans!" Meredith told Izzie.

Izzie's eyes widened.

"Seriously?" she cried. "Because when Lily kicked a hole in the door the other day because I told her that there were no more jelly babies, I thought I was living hell on earth!"

Meredith laughed and rested her chin in the palm of her hand looking over at her equally tired friend; motherhood had drained them to an exhaustive point and it was starting to become the topic of conversation.

"Mommy!" Lily called.

"Mommy!" Tess shouted.

"Momma!" James chimed in.

Izzie groaned as did Meredith as they both pressed their foreheads to the bench tops and wondered what the newest drama would be.

They walked to the foot of the stairs and chuckled at the three faces that stared at them from the top of the staircase through the barred safety gate; six hands holding a bar each and peering down as though they were prisoners.

Meredith and Izzie both laughed.

"Mommy, let us down…" Tess pleaded.

"Mmm…I'm not sure Tessie," Meredith replied.

"Momma…down!" James cried shaking the bars.

"Yeah! Mommy we want to come down!" Lily exclaimed.

Meredith and Izzie turned to each other.

"I don't know Aunty Izzie…what do you think?" Meredith asked.

Izzie laughed.

"Have they been good kids Aunty Mer?" she questioned.

"Yes!" both Lily and Tess screamed.

"Yes!" James shouted as he rattled the bars once more.

Meredith shook her head and walked up the stairs.

"Move back…" she told them as she unlatched the safety gate.

James stretched his arms up in the air as he waited for Meredith to pick him up.

"Were you nice to your sister and Lily?" Meredith asked.

James nodded.

"Good boy!" he told her.

"Oh really?" Meredith asked. "How about some cookies?"

"Tookie!" James squealed.

The girls jumped around excitedly and squealed loudly.

"Cookies!" they exclaimed.

When we reached the kitchen, Meredith sat both Lily and Tess up on the barstools and placed James in his high chair.

"Two?" James asked.

"No way buddy, only one, you can have some milk with it!" Meredith replied.

Izzie laughed as she handed the girls some cookies and poured them a glass of milk.

"What do you say?" Izzie asked them.

"Thank you mommy," Lily said.

"Thank you Aunty Izzie," Tess answered.

"You are welcome," Izzie said as she leaned down and kissed the top of their head and then turned to James. "And for you baby…" she put a cookie on the tray table for James.

"Ta!" James said happily as he stuffed the cookie in his mouth.

"Whoa, slow down mister!" Meredith cried as she took the cookie and snapped it into quarters. "Small bites!"

"Big!" James said giggling.

Meredith laughed and nuzzled his cheek.

"Cheeky boy,"

"Teeky!" James copied.

"You are a little ratbag!" Meredith smiled. She turned to the girls and kissed their foreheads. "You two are awfully quiet…maybe we should feed you cookies more often?"

"It's yummy mommy!" Tess informed her.

"Can I have a bite?" Meredith asked leaning into the cookie.

"No!" Tess giggled as she pulled it away from her mom's mouth.

Meredith smiled wickedly and leaned over.

"Fine…I'll have to eat Tessie then…what do you say Aunty Iz?"

"No!" Tess giggled.

"Or maybe you could kiss her to death!" Izzie laughed.

Meredith grabbed her daughter off the bar stool and dipped her back kissing her all over and making her giggle excitedly.

Izzie smiled and couldn't believe that Meredith was happy once again; a rare accomplishment for one woman although she held all hope for this one moment.

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"Tess, go and watch some TV honey…" Meredith called out from the kitchen to Tess who was playing in the study. "Put some kids TV on!"

She heard Tess's footsteps bounce along the hardwood floor and into the living room. Derek walked into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Meredith.

"Can we talk?"

"Mmm…hang on a second honey…" Meredith replied as she dried off one last dish leftover from dinner and turned around in his arms. "What is it…?"

"Come sit down…" he whispered.

Meredith frowned and wondered what was possibly going through his mind.

"What's up?" she asked as she sat down and felt his strong surgeon hands pull the chair closer to him.

"Mer…"

"Derek what's wrong…you're starting to scare me…" Meredith said warily.

"Um…you know how I said about Stan Woods retiring…?" Derek said uneasily.

"Yeah…but I don't see what that has to do with us…" Meredith answered with a more evident frown as every word filled the air.

"Well it actually has a lot to do with us…"

"Um…San Francisco is about 800 miles away…so it kind of distances us by _a lot_!" Meredith cried.

"Meredith…San Francisco Memorial has offered me Chief of Surgery…" Derek blurted out.

Meredith's jaw dropped to the floor.

"What?"

"They called me this morning…"

"And you just, what…forgot to tell me?" Meredith yelled.

"Honey…I wanted to find the best time to tell you…"

"No! Derek, there is no _best_ time to tell me!"

"I haven't answered them…"

"And what will your answer be?"

"I'm not sure…" Derek sighed.

Meredith eyes flared with anger as she tried to make sense of his words.

"You are _considering_ this?" she yelled.

"Honey, I have to think about our future…Richard may not retire for another ten years…" Derek said softly.

"Who cares!?" Meredith shrieked. "This is insane! I am not going to pack up our lives here Derek…it's just not right!"

"Mommy!" came Tess' voice.

"Hang on!" Meredith yelled. She turned back to Derek. "This is so unlike you!"

"Mommy!" Tess called again.

"One second Tess!" Meredith cried. "I can't believe you Derek! How could you be so selfish?"

"I just…I…" Derek was astounded by Meredith's shouts.

"You just weren't thinking!" Meredith yelled again.

But then another sound filled the air; an ear piercing scream followed by a thud that came from the living room.

And then…

Silence.

Meredith and Derek ran to the living room as Meredith let out a terrified scream… Tess was lying unconscious at the foot of the stairs in a limp heap and the safety gate had snapped off its hinges.

"Tess!" Derek shouted as he ran over to his daughter. "Call 911!"

"Her pulse Derek!" Meredith yelled as she snatched up the phone.

"It's there…she's knocked out though!"

"Answer…god damn it!" Meredith cried as tears streamed down her face. "Y-yes I need an ambulance to 613 Harper Lane…now!"

She threw the phone to the floor and ran to her daughter.

"Oh god…what do we do…"

Derek kept one finger pressed to his daughter's pulse point. He pushed up an eyelid to peer in.

"I need a light…" he cried.

"Derek…what do we do?" Meredith cried.

And for a moment…two world class doctors were helpless…

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Okay...I know you're all going to hate me; but would I ever let Mer and Derek's children die? I think not! Just needed a bit of drama to help Derek make the RIGHT decision!

**Press the pretty purple button and pass go!**

**Show the love and Review!!**


	19. Where Is My Heart

**I thank you all for the reviews; it makes a difference; believe me!!**

Meredith sat frantically in the ambulance; staring at the limp and frail body of her little girl as the paramedics worked desperately on waking her up; they pushed the epi drip three times on the way and at arrival at Seattle Grace, Bailey met them at the emergency entrance.

"What happened?" she cried.

"The safety gate…it broke…and she…and oh, Miranda…" Meredith sobbed hysterically.

Derek was still walking fast with the gurney as it was wheeled out into the emergency bay; frequently checking Tess' pulse.

"Derek…you need to move…" Bailey said as she pushed her way in front of his rather large frame with her much smaller body.

At this point, Alex had answered his trauma page and ran into the emergency bay.

"Oh god…Tess…what happened?" he cried.

"Miranda…" Derek pleaded as he tried to keep up the pace through the emergency doors. "There is a risk of cranial damage…you need to let me… I need to examine her!"

"Derek!" Bailey shoved him slightly and stood her ground. "You need to move out of the way and let me do my job…_you_ need to let _me_ take care of your daughter and right now you are not a doctor…you are her loved one…her father and it is impossible to do my job with you in my way!"

Meredith and Derek watched the gurney be pushed into a trauma bay as Alex and Bailey followed closely behind. Meredith began sobbing hysterically as Derek held her tightly and watched with all hope that his daughter would be okay.

"No…not my baby please!" Meredith's cries were distressing and horrific as they echoed through the narrow halls of trauma and across the busy walls of the emergency room.

Derek tightened his grip on her in a desperate attempt to console her from the pain that was soaring through her veins like an unstoppable rampage of bulls in a valley of dry land.

"It's going to be okay…"

"No…no, no, no!"

"Mer…she will be okay…she's a fighter…"

"We were fighting…and…oh god…"

"We can't blame ourselves…"

"Who else is there to blame Derek…?" Meredith cried. "We were fighting and she called out to me…I ignored her…"

"It's okay…" Derek soothed.

"If I had just answered her…gone to the stairs…"

"Sweetheart…we can't go back in time…"

Meredith whipped around furiously.

"Don't I know that?" she cried. "But we base our lives…our careers around windows of opportunity…clocks…life saving moments that exist only around that one little second!"

Derek sighed heavily and knew that somewhere under all the distress and all the emotional horror, she was completely and utterly right.

"I know honey," he said as he squeezed her in his arms.

Bailey emerged a few moments later looking worried by in a way slightly relieved.

"Miranda!" Derek and Meredith straightened up and looked at Bailey for answers.

"Okay…" Bailey said as she cupped her hands together. "She is still unconscious but at this stage she doesn't appear to have any serious cranial damage…her pupils are dilating with the light and she's responsive…but she has three broken ribs…"

Meredith gasped.

"And I want to do a CT to check for any internal injuries…" Bailey told them.

"Okay…" Derek said. "I'll come with you and assess if there's any cranial damage…"

"Derek!" Bailey exclaimed. "How many times do I need to repeat myself? You are her father…not her doctor…you will not be in CT while we look at your daughter…like every other family member…you will wait…"

Derek sighed in defeat.

"You can wait in the residents' lounge with Meredith…" Bailey told him. "I need to take her down to CT now…I will be able to tell you more when I know more,"

And with that remark, she returned to the trauma room to help wheel out the gurney to transport it to CT.

Meredith ran over to the gurney and stroked her daughter's cheek gently as she tried to visualise her peaceful face under the intubation tubes.

"You'll be okay sweetheart…" she whispered.

"Meredith…we need to go…" Bailey said to her.

"I love you so much Tess…" Meredith sighed as her fingertips grazed at Tess' skin once more before the gurney was wheeled away.

Bailey returned momentarily after the CT scan and had a frazzled look upon her face a midst the drama.

"Miranda!" Meredith said quickly.

"One of her broken ribs has punctured her spleen but everything else seems to be okay at this stage…" Bailey explained.

"Neuro stats?" Derek demanded.

"Fine…aside from the nasty bump on her head…" Bailey answered.

"So why isn't she awake?" Meredith asked frantically.

"Meredith, you know that a concussion in a minor can leave them unconscious for a while…just give her time…" Bailey sighed. "We've got her prepped and we'll schedule her for an emergency spleenectomy."

Meredith covered her mouth and let tears stream down her cheeks.

"Damn it…damn that gate…" she murmured.

"Meredith…" Bailey grabbed her arms. "She will be okay…"

Meredith nodded and tried her best to think positively.

It was a long two hours before Bailey emerged from OR1 to meet Meredith and Derek in the residents' lounge.

"She's going to be fine…" Bailey said.

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief.

"We removed the spleen with no complications and she'll be in recovery within the next hour…" Bailey told them.

"Can I see her?" Meredith asked instantly.

"Come with me…" Bailey led them to Tess' post op room where she slept peacefully.

"She's not intubated…" Meredith said.

"She didn't need it…" Bailey replied. "She'll wake up soon…"

Bailey then took the opportunity to leave the room.

Meredith sat at the edge of Tess' bed and stroked her cheek.

"It's only me baby," she whispered. "Oh, you gave daddy and me a real fright… we just love you so much…and I'm sure James is wondering where you are right now…"

Derek smiled and kissed Meredith's forehead.

In almost a miraculous occurrence, Tess began to stir and slowly opened her eyes.

"Oh my god…" Meredith started to cry. "Baby…you're awake…"

Tess' lower lip dropped.

"Mommy…" she whispered hoarsely. "My head hurts…"

Meredith leaned over and kissed her daughter repeatedly.

"Oh, it's okay honey…it's okay…" she said softly.

"What happened?" Tess asked croakily.

"You fell down the stairs…"

"The gate broke mommy…"

"I know baby…"

"I'm sorry I broke it…"

"It's not your fault my darling…"

"Where's daddy?"

"I'm right here angel…" Derek stepped into her vision and leaned down to kiss her gently. "You had an accident…"

"I broke the gate daddy…" Tess whispered.

"Never mind…"

"I love you daddy…"

"I love you too my darling…"

"I love you mommy…"

"I love you too honey,"

Derek turned to Meredith and sighed heavily.

"Thank god…" he whispered.

"I know…" Meredith answered.

"Mer…"

"What?"

"I'm not going to take the job…"

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to fight with you…"

Meredith sighed and put her head in her hands.

"I think we can make it work…"

"What?" Derek looked up, astonished.

"We need a change…" Meredith told him.

Derek shook his head.

"Are you serious?" he asked.

Meredith nodded.

"We can do this Derek…we _need_ to do this…"

"Okay…"

"Okay," Meredith smiled and kissed him.

**So Derek will take the job in San Fran...the next chapter will be the end, however, I promise a sequel and a very interesting ride in the next fiction; something may bring them back to Seattle...I just won't say what it is!!**

**Keep Reviewing!!**

**Amy.**


	20. Goodbye Is The Hardest Word

**Ah...the final chapter; I thank everyone for taking an interest in this story and look forward to you all sticking around for the sequel. I can't give away any details I'm afraid; only that they will return to Seattle for a very big reason!!**

Meredith and Derek paused for one moment to take one long and wistful gaze around their dream house; the land that captivated every important moment in their lives whether it was good or bad…a building at the centre of their love for each other and their children, housing the comfortable years of their lives.

"Oh…" Meredith sighed heavily as she peered around the empty living room that was once built from candles. "It looks so…"

"Empty…" Derek finished with a sigh as he wrapped his arms around her tightly from behind her, letting his hands fall to her stomach, rubbing it gently. "It's just so…"

"Sad…" Meredith sighed deeply as she rested her hands over s and stared at the now empty hallway.

Breaking the moment, she felt a tug at her bright red sweater.

"Mommy…"

She looked down at Tess who was holding what appeared to be her _Barbie_ back pack, now overstuffed with useless belongings her little girl held so dear to her heart.

"I'm all packed," she informed them with a big smile.

Meredith looked at Derek sadly and attempted a kind smile at her little girl who was standing there twirling her dark hair around her index finger; her eyes questioning their next move. Meredith leaned down and picked her up, balancing her on one side of her hip, wondering how she grew to be so heavy…

"Thank you honey," she said to Tess.

"Mommy…I was just thinking…" Tess said putting a finger in her mouth and staring around the house. "What about our house?"

"What about it Tessie?" Derek asked.

"How can we pack it up and take it on the airplane? I think it's a bit big…" she concluded.

Meredith stared helplessly at Derek, trying her best to come up with the correct answer to that; they'd talked about it to Tess numerous times, about how they were moving to San Francisco, but at three years old, it was easy to assume that she did not understand the concept completely.

She looked back at Tess as her eyes pleaded for answers; questioning every element of the response that was about to come out of her mother's mouth.

"Well…sweetheart…" Meredith sighed hesitantly as she placed Tess down on the now empty kitchen bench. "Our house will stay here, in Seattle…"

Tess frowned slightly and stared at her mother in the most confused gaze that Meredith had ever seen. She clearly didn't understand exactly what that meant.

"How come?" she asked innocently.

"Because…well…we're moving to a new house…in San Francisco…" Meredith replied. "Remember we talked about this a few times now…"

Tess shook her head.

"But…Aunty Izzie, Uncle Alex…Uncle George, Aunty Cristina…and Lily…" she said. "They're all coming with us right?"

Meredith shook her head as her eyes clouded with a new allotment of tears that threatened to spill from her eyes once more, as she realised she was leaving her family behind.

"Well no, baby, they're staying her…" she sighed.

"Oh…" Tess dropped her head. "Well…maybe I wanna stay here too…"

Meredith looked up at Derek as she watched him quickly swipe away a couple of tears from his cheeks; regardless of their relationship, Izzie, Alex, George and Cristina had become like family to him as well.

"You can't baby…" Meredith sighed.

"How come? I don't want to not see them…" Tess said sadly.

"We'll still come and see them princess…" Derek said as he raised his sweating palm to his daughter's cheek and attempted to comfort her. "When daddy starts work, we can take a vacation…"

"Can we stay here in our house?" Tess asked.

"Of course…daddy and mommy are keeping the house here, don't worry…" Derek sighed.

Tess nodded, satisfied with the response and reached out for him.

"Come on," Derek said as he pulled her off the bench and cuddled her close to him. "We've gotta make a stop before we go to the airport…and James is asleep in the car…"

Meredith nodded up and down quickly as they exited the house. Stopping for a moment at the doorway, she traced her fingertips over the door frame and stared at the empty rooms that filled the gaps in her life…what used to be her life…a house that was built from one crazy night filled with candles.

"Goodbye…" she whispered.

"C'mon mommy!" came Tess's voice from the car.

Meredith quickly wiped the final tears from her eyes as she gently shut the door behind her and fought her urge to burst into tears right then; for this house had changed her life…

--

"I…I'm sorry…" Izzie sobbed. "I…I told myself I wouldn't cry but…"

Meredith sighed heavily and looked at Izzie with teary eyes.

"Iz…" she said tearily. "You are going to make me cry…and I mean it's not like it's goodbye forever…we're going to come home for Christmas and fourth of July and birthdays…"

"This isn't your home though…" Izzie said sadly. "Not anymore…you will be living in San Francisco…"

"Iz…" Meredith grabbed her friend by the shoulders. "This will _always_ be my home…because never in my life have I felt more at home in a house with a pair that fought over wardrobe space…"

Meredith looked at George who wiped tears from his eyes.

"Never have I known a family who changed my life in ways I never thought possible…" she continued. "I will never forget the times we had in this house…and regardless of where I am…near or far…I will always call this home…"

Izzie threw her arms around Meredith and began sobbing again.

"You are a wonderful mother Izzie and a great friend…it's not goodbye, okay," Meredith said through tears. "It's just, see you soon…"

She turned to George and hugged him tightly.

"George…thank you so much…" she whispered. "I will never forget everything you have done for me…"

George tried to fight his tears, but broke down.

"Love you Meredith…" he said tearily.

"I love you too George…" Meredith replied.

Another voice sounded from the doorway; a shaky but nevertheless stern tone that Meredith knew all too well…a voice that changed her life.

"God…are we done with the crying?" came Cristina's voice.

Meredith whirled around.

"I mean yeah, she is abandoning her life and taking her fellowship at a low end southern Californian hospital that has nothing on Seattle Grace…but it's not like she is dying…"

Meredith choked on her tears.

"Cristina…" she leaned over and hugged her person tighter than she ever had before. She looked up at her with tears. "I just…there's so much…I don't know if…I just want to say…"

"It's okay…" Cristina said as she tried to fight her own tears.

"You changed my life…" Meredith sighed.

"I know…you're…just…all I can…okay, you're my person…" Cristina replied in a way only Cristina could.

Meredith knew the significance behind those words.

"See you soon…" she sighed.

"Don't find another person…" Cristina warned.

"No one will replace you," Meredith answered.

Everyone walked out the front and stood staring at Meredith and Derek as Meredith took one last look at her childhood home…

It wasn't goodbye though…just as she told Izzie.

It was just, see you soon…

"Okay…" Meredith sighed. She gave each person one last hug. Looking at Mark who had just arrived, she smiled. "McSteamy…" she chuckled.

"My favourite dirty mistress…" he smiled as he blinked back tears. He turned to Derek and hugged him tightly. "Take care man…"

"You too…" Derek replied as he turned back to his somewhat family that he'd grown to love. "We'll see you all soon…"

Tess frowned as everyone hugged her.

"Bye Lily…" she said softly.

"Bye-bye Tessie…" Lily said sadly.

Meredith and Derek climbed into the car after they strapped Tess back in the car; James woke up only momentarily to wave goodbye to his aunts and uncles.

As they drove away, Meredith watched her family disappear into the distance…staring back forward to endure whatever may come…for Seattle had changed her life…

And now she looked forward to a new experience.

**Thank you so much again, please review the final chapter and I will post the sequel ASAP!**

**Amy.**


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